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1、欲望城市（性♥爰♥专家凯莉布雷萧并且勇于发问）“祸从口出”在纽约有个统计数字In New York city, it is a statistical fact每七分钟that once every seven minutes,就会有一名女性无意间an unsuspecting woman.闭嘴Shut the fuck up!与演员约会.dates an actor.放开我我老公马上回来了Let me go! My husband will be home any minute!对莎曼珊来说和演员杰瑞约会For Samantha, one of the perks
2、 of dating Jerry the actor 让她能把自己的各种性♥爰♥幻想发挥到极致 was getting to stage full-scale fantasy productions.拜托别伤害我Please, please, dont hurt me.我都听你的Fil do anything, anything!闭嘴给我闭嘴Just shut the fuck up!给我闭嘴Shut the fuck up!好酷Oh, you are really good.闭嘴听到没？I said, shut the fuck up!你先闭嘴No, you sh
3、ut the fuck up趁我老公还没回来前再来一发and fuck me before my husband gets home.快点Now!然后他就假装把我的双手捆绑起来And then he pretended to tie my hands behind my back, 整个过程中他一直大叫and the whole time he kept screaming,Where do I begin?你在说什么？What are you talking about?一大堆纽约女人会戴发圈A lot of New York women wear scrunchies.也许在浴室里吧当她们
4、洗脸时Uh, in the bathroom, maybe when they*re washing their faces. 胡扯我每天在纽约Youre full of shit, I see women every single day, 都能看到女人戴发圈all over New York city, theyre wearing scrunchies.好吧但我的重点是Okay, but heres the thing, heres my crucial point, 在杂♥志♥社工作住在佩里街的女人 no woman who works at W Magaz
5、ine, and lives on Perry Street, 绝不会戴着发圈出现在市中心的would be caught dead at a hip, downtown restaurant, 时尚餐厅里wearing a scrunchie!这可是宝贵的意见Man, its a good thing I came along；你也许很了解男人because you may know the fellas, 但我可是女性专家but I know the ladies.好吧Great.我来念我最爱的章节Okay, can I read you my favorite part?算了别再谈书的事
6、了No, Im done talking about the book.叫外卖♥♥ ?Uh, we ordering in?然后他就闭口不谈He completely shut down.为什么Why?我为什么会口无遮拦胡言乱语Why did I have to get up on my sassy horse坏破了一切？and ruin everything?对爱乱讲话可有苦头吃Yeah, sassll bite you on the ass.最难过的是我好爱他的书And the thing that kills me is I love the book.我有一
7、整夜可以滔滔不绝I could have gushed about it all night.我为什么转眼间就让他面子挂不住？Why did I have to go straight to the negative and just pick at it?男女朋友常会这样Because youre in a relationship.史蒂夫常被我批评得体无完肤I used to pick at Steve about everything,他吃饭的样子说话的语法the way he held his fork, his grammar,还有恶心的指甲his dirty fingernails
8、.过去式了？Used to?看来他新女友有得受了He has a new girlfriend for that now.黛比Debbie!你觉得黛比也会百般挑剔？Do you think Debbie picks at Steve?那还用说女人天生如此Of course. All women pick, its in our DNA.这才能表示出女人的在乎It*s our little way of showing that we care.现在我终于搞懂了Welt I think I made it abundantly clear原来我这么在乎他just how much I care.
9、你得好好和他沟通Well, you have to work it out with him.柏格可是大大改变了我的一生Berger has single-handedly changed my life.那家伙还是没和我连络I still haven*t heard from the real estate guy,算了他没那么喜欢我but its fine, he*s just not that into me!柏格也没那么喜欢我吧I think right now, Bergers just not that into me.好好和他沟通So talk to him about it.你
10、们很般配在一起笑声不断You two seem like you could laugh your way through anything.这也是一开始我会喜欢上他的原因Yeah, its that kind of thinking that got me into this in the first place. 当母猩猩对公猩猩心生爱意时One of the signs that a female gorilla is in love母猩猩会帮它挑身上的虱子is that she can be seen picking nits off her male companion.但对人类来说
11、And yet in humans,爱挑剔却会毁了美好夜晚nitpicking can ruin a perfectly good evening,甚至毁了男女关系not to mention a relationship.有个不争的事实女人比男人善于沟通Women are known to be more verbal than men,但在什么时候建设性的批评but when does criticism that*s constructive会变成破坏性的言论？become destructive?女人该适时的闭上嘴吗？Are there times when the ladies sh
12、ould just shut the fuck up?隔天一大早另一位女士则制♥造♥了太多噪音了The next morning, another woman was making too much noise.你到底在敲什么？What on earth is all that banging?柯利尔太太早Oh, good morning, Mrs. Collier.我现在是犹太人了你好吗？Im a Jew now. How are you?他一定会打来的-I know hell call eventually. -Yeah.他一定很难熬不景气Hes just go
13、ing through a really hard time right now.上司被解雇-Mm-hmm. -His boss got laid off.之后米兰达趁午餐时间Later, on her lunch hour,查了她的无线掌上电脑Miranda checked her Blackberry.没错There it was.柏格预言的那封讨厌电子邮件来了The uncomfortable email Berger had predicted.男人每次一忙就会说“我没办法打电♥话♥Yeah. Then when they get busy, its lik
14、e, Oh, I cant call.工作压力好大太忙了”Oh, Im so stressed, I canrt call you.1他一定会打Yeah. But hes gonna call.刚好厨房♥翻修And his kitchens being rewired.事情太多了Its all so complicated.这得花两天的工程至少-Yeah, thats like a two day process. -At least.要全部拆掉They have to remove everything.打扰一下我无意中听到你们的谈话Excuse me, I couldnt h
15、elp but overhear your conversation, 希望我说的话and I hope what Im gonna say能让你们不用浪费时间和精力will save you a lot of time and energy.他没那么喜欢你Hes just not that into you.忘了他吧So, move on.祝你们愉I夬Have a great day.把福音传播给这两位痴情女后Having passed on the gospel to these New York women, 米兰达希望这个真理Miranda could only hope能散播到全世界
16、they would spread the word far and wide.-贱♥人♥ 谁问她了 ？-Bitch. -Who the hell asked her?可不是我Not me.-我知道-纽约到处是疯子-I know you didnft. -Crazy people in New York.-他一定会打给你的那还用说-Bitch, he is so gonna call you. -I know!当这两名女子的幻想破灭时And as two women*s fantasies were being shattered, 另一位女士的幻想正春花朵朵开an
17、others were being brought to life.莎曼珊琼斯？Samantha Jones?刑事组的史密斯警探Detective Smith. Department of Homicide.我要向你请教些问题女士Im afraid Im gonna have to ask you some questions, maam. 当然怎么了？Why, certainly, detective.我有麻烦了吗？Am I in some kind of trouble?-两杯纯马丁尼-好的女士-Two martinis please, straight up. -Yes, maam.给我
18、塞尔兹矿泉水吧Actually, make mine a seltzer.当然你正在执勤Oh, of course, youre working.但是你知道的大侦探But, you know, detective,小酌一下不打紧one little drink wont kill you.给他马丁尼Hell have a martini.不还是矿泉水吧No, its a seltzer.说真的我正在参加嗜酒者互诫协会Seriously； Samantha, Im in A.A.那句话倒让莎曼珊清醒了That sobered Samantha right up.过去八年来我常醉得不省人事I wa
19、s totally, like, fucked up for, like, eight years in Seattle, its. 我刚想到明天一早有个会议所以You know, I just realized I have a presentation first thing in the morning, so. 抱歉了Sorry.杰瑞将幻想带入了危险的境地Jerry had taken the fantasy into dangerous territory.真实生活Reality.两杯马丁尼Two martinis.不对我要的是矿泉水No, dude, I said a seltze
20、r.与此同时夏洛特正努力扮演幻想中的角色Meanwhile, Charlotte was hard at work on her fantasy role.玛莎史都华Martha Jewart.好的犹太布丁放进烤箱了而薄饼汤圆正在煮Okay, the kugels in the oven, the matzoh balls are boiling.再三个钟头就是安息日了Its three hours til Shabbas,我们来弄白面包卷吧I think we should start braiding the challah.“安息日”不是休息日吗？Doesnt Shabbas mean
21、day of rest/可以叫外卖♥♥i.e. ordering in?我们穿了围裙Were wearing aprons.你家有围裙吗？Do you own aprons?白面包卷来了The challah!好了不用大呼小叫的Okay, okay, you dont have to holla.米兰达像这样Miranda, like this.我根本不知道怎么弄Oh. I dont know what Im doing.你干嘛打电♥话♥叫我来？Why did you call me over here?我这几天想找个伴一起过Becaus
22、e I didnt want to spend the rest of the week saying,所以就把你找来了Guess you had to be there.哈利的朋友打电♥话♥给你没？Hey, did Harrys friend ever call you?有晚上我会和他见面Yes, as a matter of fact, Tm seeing him tonight.就穿这样去约会吧？You think I can get away with this outfit?可以啊你穿上围裙比较有女人味Definitely, the apron softe
23、ns you.帮我看一下卷完面团后要做什么？Can you read me whatrs next after its braided?夏洛特为了高中男友还写了心情口记With her high school boyfriend, Charlotte doodled,而为了哈利她“变成了犹太人”with Harry, she Jew-died.我觉得接下来应该是Um, I think it calls for“加两杯哈利约克葛登布拉特;two cups of Mrs. Harry York-Goldenblatt.我错过了什么？Did I miss something?你该不会趁我上班时跑去结
24、婚了 ？Did you get married while I was at work?没有但我们有这打算No, but that*s where were headed.你忘了加夏洛特约克布拉特You forgot Charlotte Yorkenblatt.事实上我一直在张罗Actually, I*ve been making some calls, 你们觉得十一月如何？and I was wondering how you both felt about November? 十一月？做什么？November, for what?举♥行♥婚礼For our we
25、dding.在那之前排满了犹太教聚会Most of the synagogues are booked through the fall.我没问题November works for me.哈利向你求婚没？Has Harry even proposed yet?米兰达Miranda.还没但他会提的No, but he will.那不是八字都还没一撇？Arent you counting your matzoh balls before they rise?米兰达别说了Miranda.Zip the lip.我们彼此有共识Harry and I have an understanding abo
26、ut our future.这种事不用拿出来讨论We dont have to talk about it all the time.一切顺理成章ItsIts bshert.那是什么意思？I dont know what that means.我们一定会结婚的It*s meant to be.如果没把握I would never have gone through all this trouble我不会自找麻烦if I didn*t know for sure that we were getting married.对不起我只是不希望你再受到伤害Im sorry, I just don*t
27、want to see you get hurt again.自从看清现实中的杰瑞后And ever since her reality check with Jerry, 莎曼珊就对他提不起兴趣了Samantha had no interest in seeing him again.但当她接到政♥府♥人员的电♥话♥时However, when a certain government official called, 她倒是很乐意去见一见she was more than happy to take a meeting.史密斯特务现在
28、你跑来这里Secret Service agent Smith, if youre here,谁来保护总统？who*s protecting the president?我改变心意了You know, I changed my mind.我们来玩点更火♥辣♥的I thought of something even hotter for us to play.比扮演风♥骚♥♥女♥特务更火♥辣♥ ?Hotter than secret service sluts?对-Yeah. -Oh!
29、我演自己Im me,你也演自己youre you.开始吧Go.你一听到我在戒酒之后You know, when I told you the other night I was in A.A.,拔腿就跑you bolted.怎么回事？Whats up with that?杰瑞Jerry.是杰瑞对吧？It is Jerry, isnt it?我想我们要的东西不一样Im afraid we want different things.你希望我认识真正的你You want to tell me all about you,但我不想认识真正的你and I dont want you to tell m
30、e all about you.这样会让幻想破灭It spoils the fantasy.真无情Thats harsh.对我很无情Yeah, I am harsh.也要求很高固执自给自足Im also demanding, stubborn, self-sufficient,眼光一向正确and always right.在床上办公室In bed, at the office,生活上都是如此and everywhere else.这我知道I already knew that.你只知道一点点And thats just a little bit about me.好吧酷Alright, coo
31、l.我要告诉你我的事Let me tell you one little thing about me.这有点See, this is exactly what I.我想让你知道我姓什么At least let me tell you my last name.杰洛德Its Jerrod.你父母帮你取名叫做杰瑞杰洛德？Your parents named you Jerry Jerrod?难怪你常喝醉-Yeah. -No wonder you drank.是吗？Right?莎曼珊和杰瑞There would still be accountants往后还是会上演特务的戏码and underco
32、ver agents in their future.但那一晚他们卸下面具But that night, Samantha and Jerry扮演自己got off on playing themselves.同时我也在努力化解Meanwhile, I was looking forward我们之间的发圈心结to putting the scrunchie moment behind us.说时迟那时快它就刚好出现在眼前Unfortunately, it was staring us in the face.对不起我不得不提Okay, Im sorry to have to do this,但
33、前面刚好有个戴发圈的女士but I do believe we are in the presence of a scrunchie. 如果我错了I also do believe,欢迎指教and correct me if Tm wrong,“闭嘴闭嘴“Shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up!和一个喜欢变换新花招的人I tell you, it is so refreshing在一起真是棒呆了to be with someone who likes to fuck outside the box.她就是莎曼珊And this is my friend Saman
34、tha.是啊“壁花The wallflower, right.太可怕了That is incredibly offensive.对女人施暴可不是开玩笑的Violence against women is a very serious issue.拜托那只是性幻想不用接受审查吧Oh, please, it was a fantasy, fantasies cant be censored.事实上最高法♥院♥目前正针对这方面在努力Actually, I think the supreme court is working on that right now.任何幻想都是
35、健康无害的All fantasies are healthy and harmless.你们同意吧？Dont you agree?我以男人的立场来说You know, as a guy, Ive always been under the impression只要是任何涉及强&hearts瀑♥或性暴♥力♥的事that rape or anything in the urape family1都是不好的is just. not a good idea.我可以回家了吗？Can I go home now?看到姐妹淘对新男友的笑话哈哈大笑There is n
36、o greater sound than your friends laughing我心里真是得意at your new boyfriends jokes.我们的戏码可不止一出Well, that*s not the only scenario we play.有时他会扮成史密斯参议员史密斯校长Sometimes hes Senator Smith, or Principal Smith.或史密斯狱友Cellmate Smith.换个话题吧因为这里正好是纽约市区that we are in New York City proper.而这位女士也没在浴室里洗脸This woman does no
37、t appear to be washing her face,她又刚好出现在she appears to be standing on line市中心的时尚餐厅里at a hip, downtown restaurant.这可推♥翻♥ 了你对纽约女人的理论So, kinda kills your New York-woman theory.踢到铁板了女性专家Ah, tough break, Bradshaw.她不是纽约客Shes not from New York.什么？What?算了It doesnt matter.我们还要等多久？Did they say ho
38、w long the wait was gonna be?对不起Excuse me.打扰一下Hi, Im sorry to bother you,不知道你住在纽约哪一区？we were just wondering what part of New York you live in?我吗？Who, me?天啊Oh, gosh!我从乔治亚州梅肯来的I am from Macon, Georgia.谢谢你我快乐翻天了But thanks, you made my whole day!亲爱的听到没？Honey, did you hear that?他们以为我是纽约客These people thin
39、k I live in New York.我饿扁了什么时候可以入坐？Im so hungry, when are they gonna let us sit down?在市中心大快朵颐咖哩羊肉加酸辣酱的美食之后Downtown, over curried lamb and chutney, 米兰达惊讶地发现自己Miranda found herself pleasantly surprised对夏洛特的媒人眼光赞赏有加by Charlottes matchmaking skills.印度比尔亚尼菜真辣Whew, that was one spicy biryani.没错辣到嘴都麻了I know
40、, Ive lost all feeling in my tongue.你想喝咖啡吗？Listen, I know a great place around the corner我知道附近有间很棒的店if you want to get coffee.我很想但You know, I wish I could, but I really.我该走了should call it a night.没关系我了解Hey, its fine, I understand.你没那么喜欢我Youre just not that into me.没关系我懂And its okay. I get it!不是我喜欢你但
41、我真的得走了No, no, no, I like you, I just. really have to go.保罗Paul.别骗人了Cmon, you can stop lying.我没骗你I am not lying.像个男子汉说实话Come on, be a man, tell the truth!我想拉肚子I have diarrhea.显然保罗看起来是柏格理论的特殊案例Apparently, there is one rare exception to Berger*s rule.都是因为咖哩的关系And it often involves curry.用餐后柏格点了香蕉派吃Afte
42、r dinner, Berger ate banana cream pie, 我则因说错话而努力弥补and I ate my words.我也好喜欢Another thing I loved你将修女会的电♥话♥was the way you used the sister*s phone calls比喻成街灯柱as little land-posts.当做地标路标.I mean, landmarks or miles. mile-posts? I dont总而言之你让整个剧情生色不少Anyway, I just loved how those sort of pun
43、ctuated the story.这是很棒的点子It was just a really nice touch.对了还有序文Oh, my God, the introduction!太优秀了Brilliant.你宛如男主角的化身Youre instantly on this guys side,虽然他是个大呆瓜even though hes a complete mess.真是一针见血You know, you really just nailed him.当我正在加班努力弥补时While I was working overtime.夏洛特的工作终于接近尾声了Charlottes work
44、 was finally coming to an end.哈利快:来Harry, you can come on in now.这是什么？Whats all this?为了庆祝我们第一次过安息日Well, since its our first Shabbas together, 我费了一点心思I wanted to make it a little special.“一点心思” ?这可是丰盛大餐A little? This is phenomenal.现在只要点上蜡烛就可以唱圣歌♥ 了I just need to get the candles and then we can
45、 say the brucha.加油Oh, come on!亲爱的电视关掉要用餐了Honey, please turn that oft were about to eat.香味四溢Mmm! Smells incredible.你居然还做了牛胸肉棒呆了And you made brisket, I cannot believe you made brisket!# Baruch ata adonai # Elo-hay-nu me-lech ha-olam # Ah-sher kid-ish-anu bi-mitzvo-tav # Vet-ziv-anu li-had-lik-ner # Shel shabbat #安息日愉快Good Shabbas.安息口愉快亲爱的Good Shabbas, sweetie.真不敢相信你居然做了一整桌菜Mmm, I cannot bel