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1、Topicsentenceandparagraphs/p44第1页段落结构段落结构o“人之立言，因字而成句，积句而成章，积章而成篇。”o刘勰文心雕龙章句o一篇文章只有漂亮生动句子还是不够，我们还必须注意把文意所衔领句子按照一定规律组织起来，成为一个或者数个段落，从而使要表示各层意思都清楚分明。只有这么组成文章，才会给人浑然一体但又清楚有致美感。o第2页o一、主题句一、主题句o“揭全文之指，或在篇首，或在篇中，或在篇末。在篇首，则后必顾之；在篇末，则前必注之；在篇中，则前注之，后顾之。”这是刘熙载在艺概中讲话，即使说是汉语整篇文章写作，但一样适合用于英文段落。在比较正规英文写作(formalwr
2、iting)中，往往就有这么“揭全段之旨”句子，它就是主题句(topicsentence)。简单一点说，主题句就是对全段主题概括性陈说。段落中其它句子都是对它扩展、支持或证实。o主题句起着统摄全段作用。在写作者一方，下笔能够力顾着眼点，做到内容醒目突出而且不跑题。而在读者一方，则能够经过主题句快速地明确作者主题，读起文章来比较快捷。o需要指出是，英语文章对全文主旨句和段落主题句要求是非汉语文章所及。受两种文化影响，汉语文章在结构方面往往比英语文章愈加随意，作者既能够开门见山立显要旨，也可曲径通幽委婉道来，甚至能够指桑骂槐旁敲侧击。对于主题揭示很多情况下都采取“春秋笔法”，隐而不说。英语文章段落
3、则要明白得多，往往需要规矩完整主旨句和主题句。这一点需要每一个英语作文学习者寄予相当注意。为加强这方面意识，我们下面看毛荣贵和DorineS.Houston合编中国大学生作文评改中两个例子：第3页oInthisworld,weshouldthinkmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.Bysodoing,ourworldwillbefullofhappiness.This,ofcourse,ismypersonalview.ButitisalessonIhavedrawnfromoneofmyownexperience.Sonow,Iwouldliketoshare
4、thatexperiencewithyou,mydearreader.o这是一名中国大学生作文ApplauseontheBus中开头。在本书中国编者看来，这么开头自然而且不俗，符合汉语写作习惯。然而美国编者认为：Thisisessentiallyasolidessay.ThewriterusesananecdotetomakeapointNowwejustneedtogiveitagood,strongtopicsentenceusingthewritersownideastoformit.她给这个开头段拟了下面主题句：第4页oAlittlegirltaughtme,andabusfulofp
5、eople,animportantlessonabouttheimportanceofthinkingmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.oOnedayItookaverycrowdedbustoschool第5页o在另外一篇作文PartofMyChildhood中，作者开头是这么写：oInmychildhood,thereweresomanythingsthatwereworthcallingtomind.Somemademehappy,somemademeexcited,andsomemademesad.Butamongthemwasanunforgettab
6、lething,whenIthinkofit,mygoodfriendTongTongwilloccurtome.o作为汉语读者来说，首先用抒情笔法奠定一个气氛，然后引导读者逐步进入对于往事回想，这么开头是非常自然而且感人。不过美国编者显然不这么认为：oThisisamovingstoryaboutfriendswhohavequarreled.Itneedsagoodtopicsentencetobringthereaderintothefeelingsandmessagethewriterwantstoconvey.o这位美国编者提供了这么开头：第6页oOneofthemostunforg
7、ettableexperienceofmychildhoodinvolvesmygoodfriendTongTong.IthappenedwhenIwaseightyearsold.o我们从上面两个例子能够看出，尽管有千篇一律嫌疑，英语写作追求审美效果和汉语写作是大相异趣。学习英文写作，对这么差异要时刻切记。第7页o主题句位置主题句位置o普通说来，主题句既能够是在段落开始，也能够处于段落中间或者末尾。o1）主题句在段首o主题句放在句首是英语段落写作中最常见一个方法。中国大学生作文评改中国作者毛荣贵说：“笔者曾就美版ReadersDigest和Time两本期刊100篇短文做过调查，发觉其中仅有两
8、篇其topicsentence较为含糊，而有68篇topicsentence均被置于文/段首，其余30篇已经将段落topicsentence升格为小标题。”依据这种情况，我们提议全部英语作文初学者将段落主题句放置于段首。下面是几个对应例子：第8页oJane and Karen have many things in common.Tobeginwith,bothgirlshavethesamebackground.JanewasbornandraisedintheWest,andsowasKaren.Next,bothgirlsareinterestedinthesamekindsofsubj
9、ectsinschool.JanelikesFrench,history,andEnglish.Inthesameway,KarenlikesSpanish,historyandEnglish.Furthermore,bothgirlswanttobeteachers.Janeplanstobecomeanelementaryschoolteacher.ButKarenwantstobeahighschoolteacher.Asyoucansee,thetwogirlsarealmostliketwins.第9页oEven when we are very careful in the thi
10、ngs we do each day,the risk ofloss and injury is always with us.Startingthedaywithashower,weriskslippingandfallingthroughtheglassdoor.Ridingtowork,weriskcollision.Whileweareawayfromourhomes,theriskoffireandburglaryisgreater.Goingtoschool,ourchildrenriskbeinginjured.Wealsolossthroughunintentionalacti
11、onsofourownthatmightinjureothers.Sucheventsmayoccurregardlessofhowcarefulwemaytrytobe,andtheycancostusalotofmoney.Ratherthantakingthechanceofbeingwipedoutfinancially,wetransfersomeorourriskstoothers,webuyinsurance.第10页oEating lunch is one of my favorite pastimes.Becauselunchcomesinthemiddleoftheday,
12、itgivesmeawelcomebreakfromstudying.Atschool,lunchmeansthirtyminutesoutofclassandachancetorestafterthemorningswork.Whileeating,IcanplanwhatImgoingtodointheafternoon.Andbesidesofferingapleasantbreakintheday,lunchisalwaysagoodmeal.第11页o2）主题句在段落中间oTheofficersofmostdoctorstodayareoverloadedwithpeoplewhoa
13、reconvincedthatsomethingdreadfulisabouttohappentothem.Atthefirstsignofpaintheyruntoadoctor,failingtorealizethatpainisrarelyanindicationorpoorhealth.We are becoming a nation of pill-grabbers and hypochondriacs who regard the slightest ache as a searing ordeal.Insteadofattackingthemostcommoncausesofpa
14、insuchastension,worry,boredom,frustration,insufficientsleep,overeating,poordiets,smoking,orexcessivedrinking,toomanypeoplereachalmostinstinctivelyforthepainkillers-aspirins,barbiturates,codeine,tranquilizers,sleepingpills,anddozensofotherdesensitizingdrugs.第12页oCaliforniansandNewEnglandersarebothAme
15、rican.Theyspeakthesamelanguageandabidebythesamefederallaws.But they are very different in their ways of life.Mobility-bothphysicalandpsychological-hasmadeagreatimpressiononthecultureofCalifornians;lackofmobilityisthemarkofthecustomsandmoralityofNewEnglanders.第13页3）主题句在段落末尾oAtthebeginningofawritingco
16、urse,manystudentsearnlowgradesbecausetheyareinexperiencedwriters.Theysimplydontknowhowtowriteaneffectiveessay,andintheprocessoflearningtodoso,theymakemistakes-andlowgrades.Suchgradesaffectthestudentsconfidenceandmorale,makingwritinganunpleasanttaskassociatedwithanxietyandfailure.Asaresult,studentsar
17、ediscouraged;insteadofworkingseriouslyontheirwriting,theyspendtimeworryingabouttheeasiestwaytoearnabettergradeonthenextpaper-usuallybywriting“safe”papersthataresimpleandcorrectbutlackinginthought.Therefore,the assigning of traditional grades in a freshman writing course often works against the purpo
18、se of the course-to help students learn to write better.第14页oAmericansmightbeembarrassedbecausetheirJapanesefriendsaresoformalwiththem.JapanesemightfeelinsultedbecauseAmericanacquaintancesgreetthemcasually.Still,theformsofgreetinginbothcountriesonlyshowrespectforothers.It just happens that Americans
19、 and Japanese have a different way of looking at human relationships and thus have a different way showing respect.第15页4）段落没有主题句o英文正规文章，尤其是informativewriting极少没有主题句，没有主题句情况普通出现在记叙文体中。不过也有作者有意隐而不说情况。oThebrightchildispatient.Hecantolerateuncertaintyandfailure,andwillkeeptryinguntilhegetsananswer.Whena
20、llhisexperimentsfail,hecanevenadmittohimselfandothersthatforthetimebeingheisnotgoingtogetananswer.Thismayannoyhim,buthecanwait.Veryoften,hedoesnotwanttobetoldhowtodotheproblemorsolvethepuzzlehehasstruggledwith,becausehedoesnotwanttobecheatedoutofthechancetofigureitoutforhimselfinthefuture.Notsothedu
21、llchild.Hecannotstanduncertaintyorfailure.Tohim,anunansweredquestionisnotachallengeoranopportunity,butathreat.Ifhecantfindtheanswerquickly,itmustbegiventohim,andquickly;andhemusthaveanswersforeverything.Sucharethechildrenofwhomasecond-gradeteacheroncesaid,“Butmychildrenliketohavequestionsforwhichthe
22、reisonlyoneanswer.”Theydid;andbyamysteriouscoincidence,sodidshe.o(Impliedtopicsentence:Toabrightchildapuzzleorunansweredquestionisachallenge,whereastoadullchilditisathreat.)第16页oFirstyoumustwaitforasunnyday.Rememberthattheraysofthesunaremostdirectbetween11A.M.and2P.M.Thisisthetimewhenyouwilltanthequ
23、ickest.Attherighttimeandontherightday,pickanopenspotoutdoorsandlayoutalargetowelorbeachmat.Youmaywanttobringalongseveralthings:suntanoil,aportableradio,abookormagazine,sunglasses,apillow.Itisagoodideanottostayinthesuntoolongatfirst.Beginwithahalfhour,andthengraduallyincreasethetimeyouspendinthesun.C
24、ertainpartsofyourbodywillburnmorequicklythanothers.Theseincludethebacksofyourknees,theinsideofyourelbows,yourshoulders,andyournose.Besuretocoverthesespotswithsuntanoilwhenyoufirstgooutside.Coverthemagainwithoilafteryouhavebeenoutsideinthesunforawhile.(Possible implied topic sentence:Taking a sunbath
25、 calls for careful planning.)第17页o主题句写作要注意两个基本要求：第一是要包含主导思想(thecontrollingidea)；第二是要做到概括和详细统一。o在普通情况下，一个段落要求作者只表示一个意思，不一样意思要放在另外段落中表示，不然轻易枝杈横生，使人不得要领。这个意思就是主导思想。比如我们不能说：“Wehadapleasantsummervacationbutsummervacationalwaysseemsshort.”。因为前面一个分句表述了一个事实，后面一个分句表述是作者一个看法。你不可能在一个段落中做到两方面都兼顾。o在详细主题句写作中，作者还要
26、注意把自己思想用最切近语言表示出来。既不能过于概括，也不能过于详细。假如过于概括，作者写作往往会漫无目标或者以偏概全，从而造成段落因为得不到应有充实而显得空泛无力；假如主题句过于详细，作者思想就没有发挥余地，极易造成对一个意思颠倒重复，而真正意思却不能得到充分表示。在详细写作中，最轻易出现现象就是主题句过于概括现象。第18页写主题句时要回避以下4个错误：IncompleteShould not be a questionMust not be too broadShould not contain phrases like“I think”,“In my opinion”,etc.第19页My
27、 mother has passed along to me certain rules for getting along with others.Dont argue with parents;they will think you dont love them.Dont argue with children;they will think themselves victimized.Dont argue with spouses;they will think you are a tiresome mate.Dont argue with strangers;they will thi
28、nk you are not friendly.My mothers rules,in fact,can be summed up in two words:Dont argue.第20页oOurlifetodaydependsverymuchonenergy.Intownsandinvillages,onfarmsandinfactories,machineshavemadelifeeasierthanitusedtobe.Themachinesuseenergy,andenergyisneededforheating,lighting,communications,carryinggood
29、s-everything.Factoriesandindustrialplantsuseagreatdealofenergytomakethethingsthatweuseandbuyandsell第21页（主题句）No one can avoid being influenced by advertisements.（推展句1）Much as we may pride ourselves on our good taste,we are no longer free to choose whatever we want,for advertising exerts a subtle infl
30、uence on us.（推展句2）In their efforts to persuade us to buy this or that product,advertisers have made a close study of human nature and have classified all our little weakness.There are two ways in which one can own a book.The first is the property right you establish by paying for it,just as you have
31、 made it a part of yourself and the best way to make yourself a part of it is by writing in it.第22页o请看下面病例：Iwanttotalkaboutmyfather.Heisstrictwithhischildren,especiallyme.HewontletmeoutofthehouseunlessIvedoneallmyhomework.Heisatallandratherskinnyman.Somepeoplesayheisgood-looking.Hehasanicestreakofgr
32、ayinhishair.Helaughsalotandenjoyslife.Myfatherisinteresting.o读完这个段落，我们只能得到对于“我父亲”一些零乱印象，但又都不鲜明。造成这种情况主要原因是作者没有写好主题句。“Iwanttotalkaboutmyfather”这个主题句过于宽泛，没有起到限定话题作用。所以作者一会儿讲作者父亲对待我态度；一会儿讲父亲外貌特征，过一会儿又说到父亲性格特征。真如同笔下穿着溜冰鞋，滑来滑去，不知所终。o第23页o扩展句扩展句o一个段落是由主题句和扩展句共同组成。扩展句是对主题句延伸或证实。它们之间关系组成一个段落好坏关键。o扩展句和主题句之间最
33、少要注意以下两点：第一，意义相关性（unity）；第二，逻辑一致性(coherence)。o所谓意义一致性指是全部扩展句都必须是主题句延伸或者证实，它对主题句能起到支持作用。不然，这么扩展句就应该删除掉。在这方面，我国古人有“丸之走盘”形象比喻（“丸之走盘，横斜圆直，不可尽知也。其必可知者，是丸之不出于盘也。”杜牧），说就是作者笔不论怎样恣意汪洋，不过都不能超出一个范围，这个范围就是由主题句限定。o不过只有内容上一致性还不足以确保能写出一个好段落。在行文过程中作者还要注意各个句子正确、紧凑安排，也就是要确保意义连贯性。比如我们有B、C、D和E四个句子都能够证实A这个主题句，不过它们位置怎样安排
34、呢？那就要依据它们之间关系以及与主题句之间关系来安排，而且还要有一定过渡词来表达这种安排。只有这么，作者写来才会顺理成章，而读者读来也会如顺水行舟，没有妨碍。第24页o实现意义连贯普通采取两种伎俩：逻辑连贯和过渡词使用。逻辑连贯就是依靠扩展句本身含有逻辑关系对句子进行正确排列所实现连贯；过渡词使用就是依靠过渡词表现连贯意义。o在内容一致性上，初学者轻易犯错误主要有：1）跑题；2）重复；3）片面；而在意义连贯上，初学者犯主要毛病是信笔游走，行文没有规矩，或者没有必要过渡词。第25页病例病例o1、跑题、跑题oThereportindicatesthatbabiesoffatherswhosmoke
35、arelikelytobesmallerandweakerthanbabiesofnon-smokingfathers.Ofcourseitisalreadywellknownthatpregnantwomenwhosmokecandamagethehealthoftheirbabies.Mysistersmokedtwentycigarettesadaywhenshewasexpectingherfirstchild.Anotherworryingpointisthatsmokingjustbeforethestartofthepregnancycanaffectthebabylater.I
36、heardrecentlythatcertainfoodsharmunbornbabies.o在这个例子中，主题句说原来是父亲抽烟对于小孩子健康影响，不过支持句讲却是未来母亲抽烟对孩子影响。更可笑是段落最终一句说是一些食物可能对胎儿产生危害，真可谓离题千里了。第26页o2、岔题、岔题oThemainschoolbuildingcontainsmostoftheclassrooms.Thatwasour“secondhome”,theplacewheremyclassmatesandIworked,studied,andlearnedforthreeyears.Beyondthatisthesc
37、iencebuilding.Thatswherewedidallourlaboratoryworkforchemistryandphysics.Ontherightsideofsciencebuildingisalibrary,wheretherearealargecollectionofbooksandperiodicals.Weallenjoyedreading,andfromthiswegotagreatdealofbenefits.Sinceourteacherswererichinknowledgeandtaughtusveryearnestly,wehadalwaysdonebet
38、terthanstudentsofotherschoolsinjointexaminations.o从语言上讲这是一篇不错段落，而且前半部分描写相当有序：分别介绍了教学大楼、试验楼和图书馆。不过段落最终两句话却又另起炉灶，谈到了其它方面，严格说来这是不允许。另外本段还缺乏一个主题句，请同学们为之代拟。第27页o3、重复、重复oWatchingTVtoomuchisharmfultoyoureyes.IfyoustayinfrontofTVfortoolongtimeyoureyesmightgethurt.Youwillbenear-sighted.Youcannotseeclearlywhe
39、nyouread.Youevencannotseeclearlyafriendwhenyoumeethiminstreet.o在这个例子中，我们能够发觉，这位同学思绪总是要在一个地方停留一两步，然后才肯离开。第一句作为段首句是相当不错，可是第二句却对它进行了重复，意思基本雷同。这完全是对有限空间浪费。第28页o4、片面、片面oOurschoolisanArmyschool,sowemustobeymanyrules.Becauseofthismyhouseisspecialinsomeways.First,ourhouseisveryclean,havenopieceofpaperontheg
40、round.Everythinginmyhouseisneat.Perhapssomeotherhouseisdirty,butifmyhouseisdirtywewouldbepunishedandforcedtocleanit.o这是一年级学生习作，其中有不少语言错误。但就内容来讲，本段支持句只讲了一个内容，也就是Wemustkeepourroomsclean。这是不足以证实Wemustobeymanyrules这一段首句。第29页o练习练习o1、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：o1.a.Computersspeedupregistrationbyprovid
41、ingup-to-dateinformationonopenclasses.ob.Theyassistinstructorsbymarkingmultiple-choicetests.oc.Computersnowperformmanytasksonmycampus.od.Computerscansupplyadvisorswithinstantandcompleteinformationonrequirements,careerinformation,andpersonaldatawhiletheyaretalkingtoastudent.oe.Computerskeeprecordsfor
42、thebookstore,library,cafeteria,andmaintenancedepartment.第30页o2.a.MynewFuturecamerahasseveralfeaturesthatIlike.ob.Itadvancesthefilmaftereachshotandautomaticallyrewindsitaftereachroll.oc.Comparedtoothercameras,itisinexpensive.od.IfIgettooclosetothesubject,italertsmewithabuzzer.oe.Itbeamsoutaninfraredr
43、aythatfocusesforme,eveninthedark.of.Itislightweightandcompact.第31页o3.a.Sometimesrapidly,sometimesslowly,theywentrelentlesslyupward.ob.LastweektheLaborDepartmentreported,however,thattheeconomysseventeen-yearinflationaryspiralhad,foronemonthatleast,finallybeenbroken.oc.DuringMarch,inflationactuallywen
44、tdowninsteadofup.od.Thisturnedatrendofwhateconomistscalldisinflationintooutrightdeflation.oe.Since1965,pricesintheU.S.economyhavebeenheadingoneway.第32页o4.a.Movingbackhomewithhisparentswouldsavehimquiteabit.ob.Hewasgladthathenolongerhadtoworkfull-timewhilegoingtoschool.oc.Hisincometaxrefundwasenought
45、ocoverhisexpensesfortherestofthesemester.od.Thedeansofficeapprovedhisstudentloan,andhecouldcuthisworkinghours.oe.Hehadfinallypaidoffhiscar.of.Thingswerebeginningtolookup.第33页o5.a.TwoyounggirlstookturnsthrowingtheirFrisbeetotheirdog,whichleapedintotheairtocatchit.ob.Afamilyoftouristsstoodinfrontofthe
46、fountain,studyingamapandtryingtorememberwheretheyhadlefttheircar.oc.ItwasatypicalMaySundayafternoonatthepark.od.Fromthefreewaythatcircledtheparkthesoundofafireenginecouldbeheard.oe.Acouplesatonablanket,theirbabycrawlingonthenearbygrass.第34页o2、依据下面主题词完成一个主题句，然后、依据下面主题词完成一个主题句，然后展开组成一个段落：展开组成一个段落：oThe
47、reasonwhyIreadbooksisthatoThestupidityofthenucleararmsrace.oTrafficisoneoftheessentialactivitiesinoursociety.oSmokingisharmfultohealth.oTelevisionpresentsavividworldinfrontofus.第35页o3、依据下面主题句，思索需要哪些内容来支持它：、依据下面主题句，思索需要哪些内容来支持它：oThethrillofabigcity.oOwningacarisexpensive.oWhat a satisfying career sho
48、uld be oSpring is the most pleasant season of the year.oPeople take part in sports for various reasons oovergrowth of population presents a threat to the existence of humansociety.第36页oSpringisthemostpleasantseasonoftheyear.Inspring,itiswarmandcomfortableandtheairisfreshandsoft.Theflowersareinfullbl
49、oom,attractingbeesandbirdstodancearound.Withthesnowmelting,thetreesbudding,eggshatched,everythingcomesbacktolife.ThemilddaysoftheSpringmakesitthebestseasonfortraveling,whichnotonlybringsyouintoclosecontactwithnature,butalsomakesyoufeelrefreshedfromthetiringandtediouswork.Springistheseasonforsowing.I
50、fwewanttohaveagoodharvestoragoodresult,wehavetomakeagoodplanintheseasonofthespring第37页oPeopletakepartinsportsforvariousreasons.Sometakepartinsportsjustbecausetheyloveitanditcanbringthempleasure.Othersgoinforsportsforthesimplereasonthattheywanttobephysicallyhealthy/fit.Theybelievethatregularexercisew