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1、欲望城市(性♥爰♥专家凯莉布雷萧)残酷的真♥相 ♥两年前我朋友苏珊雪伦Two years ago, my friend, Susan Sharon,意大利喀什米尔羊毛运动服东岸代理商the east coast rep for a line of Italian cashmere sportswear,嫁给一个脾气非常暴躁的男人married a very mean man.我跟你说过听完CD要怎样?What did I tell you about listening to my CDs?你把娜塔莉放到U2的盒子里了You put Na
2、talie Imbruglia back in U2!现在我跟她每年只见一两次面Now, I only see her once or twice a year,通常是当她丈夫出城的时候generally when her husband is out of town.我不记得晚餐前是否吃过安♥眠♥药♥And now I cannot remember if Ive taken my Halcion before dinner or not.所以我又吃了一颗喝了杯鸡尾酒So I take another one, I have a cocktail,不
3、觉得痛苦Im feeling no pain.接下来我只知道空姐正赏我巴掌The next thing I know this freaked out stewardess想把我打醒is slapping me awake.“夫人到了,Signora, Signora! Buona sera! Buona sera!1我睁开眼睛环顾机舱So I open my eyes, I look around the plane,人都走光了its completely empty.飞机半小时前在米兰降落了Turns out we landed in Milan 30 minutes ago.我的天Oh,
4、 my God.你知道吗快跟我回公♥寓♥我要送你一个礼物Oh, you know what, come up to my apartment because I have something for you.这里看起来好气派-小声一点-The place looks fantastic. -Shh.夏洛特决定一切要掌握在自己手中Charlotte decided to take matters into her own hands.她搜遍全市寻找完美的物种有教养体面又时髦She combed the city for the perfect specimen of
5、breeding, style and trendiness. 亨利我回家了Henry, Tm home.小乖乖Hi, my good boy.亨利Hello, Henry.好狗儿My good boy.在找到完美的男人以前Until she found the perfect man,夏洛特先养只完美的狗Charlotte would have the perfect dog.那晚向来不擅长保守秘密的莎曼珊That night, Samantha, who was never any good at keeping a secret,发现她不能说出口的话suddenly found the
6、one thing she couldnt say却一直盘据在她脑海was the only thing she could think about.甜心有什么不对劲吗?Sweetheart, is anything wrong?我希望你告诉我Because if there is, I want you to tell me.亲爰的没有我累了Oh, no, honey, Tm tired.你变得好冷淡Well, I just feel like youve become so distant.你好像在生我的气Like youre upset with me about something.抱
7、歉跟你无关是我的问题Im sorry, it*s not you, its me.我没有在气任何事Im not upset about anything.你很好Youre wonderful.你愿意陪我去找感情顾问吗?Will you do me a favor and come see a couples counselor with me?莎曼珊畏惧心理医生的程度Samantha dreaded the shrink就跟大部分人怕看牙医一样the way most people feared the dentist.如果这真的对你很重要Well, if its really importa
8、nt to you. I.太好了Great.晚安Goodnight.她突然渴望那些She suddenly longed for the simple days感情空窗期的单身生活以及火热的一♥夜&heartsJW♥of emotional unavailability and hot one night stands.与此同时米兰达成了窈窕淫♥娃♥中的Meanwhile, across town, Miranda was appearing as Eliza Doolittle, 女主角依莉莎杜利朵in My Filthy Lady.我
9、好喜欢亲吻这边的性感带I just love kissing this sensitive spot right here.你喜欢吗?You like that?喜欢Uh-huh.告诉我你喜欢什么?Tell me what you like.那个That.你喜欢我用手爰抚你的胸部吗You like my hand there? Caressing your breast?当然-轻轻捏你的乳♥头♥ ?-Sure. -Gently pinching your nipple.很好Fine.亲吻我的胸膛Oh, yeah. Kissing my chest.好舒服Thats
10、hot.那真的让我好兴奋That really turns me on.觉得怎么样?Hows it feel?执吗执 八、L J 八、-Hot? -Hot.还有呢?And?-胸毛浓密? 老天你让我勃起了-Hairy? -Oh, God, youre getting me hard.告诉我它是什么感觉Tell me how it feels.大?Big.还有呢?And?硬Hard?-像石头般硬对说下去-Rock hard. -Yeah, keep talking.大石头A big rock.很好Yes.坚硬的石头A hard rock.一个坚硬的大石头A big hard rock.太好了Oh,
11、 yeah.-一根香肠-宝贝你真下流-A sausage. -0h; baby, you are so nasty.出乎意料地米兰达一开了口Surprisingly enough, once Miranda opened her mouth, 就发现很难闭嘴she found it difficult to shut up.一根巨大会震动A big, throbbing, 石头般坚硬的香肠-rock-hard sausage.那天晚上我带苏珊雪伦去见夏洛特生命中的新男性That night I took Susan Sharon to meet the new male in Charlott
12、es life. 一如往常它已经远低于她的高期望True to form, he was already falling far short of her high expectations. 一分钟前它做得到Well, he did it a minute ago.它反复无常He was inconsistent.去捡球Get the ball, Henry.自私固执Selfishly stubborn,而且无可救药地相互依赖and hopelessly co-dependent.它很聪明吧?Isnt he smart?我们不该待太久We shouldnt stay long.我想回去以免理
13、查打电♥话♥来I want to be back at your apartment in case Richard calls.什么意思你不是离开他了?What do you mean, I thought you were leaving him?没错但我想告诉他I am; but if he calls I want to be there to tell him我不想跟他说话that I dont want to talk to him.那是消极的主动Well, thats really passive aggressive.真的有事要说才跟他讲话You s
14、hould only speak to him if you have something specific to say.你敢相信我居然嫁给了一个混帐Do you believe I married such a prick?当时你不知道他是个混帐Well, you didn*t know he was a prick.我不敢相信那混帐还没打来I just cant believe that prick hasnt called.他确实有温柔的一面Although he does have this sweet side, you know,你跟他不熟you just dont know h
15、im very well.你认为我做对了吗?亨利?Do you think I did the right thing, Henry?还是我应该给他Or should I give him another chance.它是一只狗不是先知Hes a dog, not an oracle.隔天早上起床我收到一个令人不安的生日惊喜The next morning I woke up to an unsettling birthday surprise.来了Coming.在这里签名-Oh. -Sign here.谢谢Thank you.我的天Oh, my God.“诚挚献上生日祝福Best wish
16、es on your birthday.是大人物送的Its from Big.什么花?What kind of flowers?红玫瑰Roses, red.一大束Big.很贵Expensive.你们觉得那是什么意思?What do you think it means?表示把卡片撕碎It means rip up the card.小心花上的刺And watch out for the thorns.不这是个重大的宣示No, no, no, this is the grand gesture.重大的宣示?The grand gesture?若你和某人分手而他Yeah, you know, if
17、 you break up with someone and they just就此消失那么你们真的不该在一起disappear from your life altogether, well, then it wasnt meant to be.但若他做出强有力的爰情宣示But if they make a powerful declaration of their love, 你就得重新考虑了then you really have to reconsider.一束玫瑰花加上祝福卡片You think a dozen roses and a card that says,就成了重大宣示?b
18、est wishes qualifies as the grand gesture?男人绝对不会说我错了”Well, you know men, they can never say I was wrong.他们送花来道歉They just send flowers.有时候玫瑰就只是玫瑰Yeah, well, sometimes a rose is just a rose.如果是珠宝那就另当别论Now, jewelry, thats another story.不行亨利不可以咬皮包Henry, no, not the purse.我的生日不需要这个You know, I really dont
19、 need this on my birthday.那代表什么?I mean, really, what does this mean,轮到我发球?the balfs in my court or something?我不想玩游戏I dont want to play games.这不是重大的宣示This is not the grand gesture.这是暧昧的宣示This is the vague gesture.比完全没宣示还糟Which is truly worse than no gesture at all.其实他一直很自私You know, under the guise of
20、 being thoughtful hes actually being very selfish. 我同意他存心捣乱I agree. Hes muddied the waters.你们疯了Oh, youre all just cuckoo.-他在她生日时送花你们却骂他-亨利不可以The man sends her flowers on her birthday and youre all condemning him. Henry, no. 该死No, damnit.饶了那只狗吧For chrissake, give that dog a break.它已经咬烂我四双鞋Hes already
21、 eaten four pairs of shoes.不能让它转移目标到皮包上I just dont want him starting on the purses.该死我们回家去Damnit, now. Okay, we*re gonna go home.你想出来活动You said you wanted to get out and socialize, 得先学好规矩but you just have to learn how to behave.再见Bye.你得学着听话Listen, youre just going to have to learn how to behave.说到发疯
22、Speaking of cuckoo.夏洛特即将见识到Charlotte was at the point in her relationship亨利的真面目where she was starting to see the real Henry.但她的确提出一个问题But she did raise a valid question.“我错了这句话真让大人物说不出口吗?Was I was wrong the one thing Mr. Big couldnt say?我们分手并不表示I realized that just because we were no longer together
23、我无法以礼相待didn*t mean I couldnt be polite.-喂?-是我-Yeah. -Hey, its me.凯莉Carrie.你好吗?Hey, how are you doing?很好Great, great.我想谢谢你送花给我Listen, I just wanted to call and thank you for the flowers.你真体贴That was very thoughtful of you.我秘书♥记♥在她的行事历上了Well, you know, my secretary had it on her calendar
24、.所以是你秘书送的?Oh, so your secretary sent them.不是我送的她提醒我是今天No, I sent the flowers, my secretary alerted me to the day.你跟她都很体贴Oh, well, that was very thoughtful of her and you for sending them. 不客气你今天要做什么?So, youre welcome, um, What are you doing on the big day?史丹佛要在那间摩洛哥式餐厅Oh, well, uh.Stanfords arranged
25、 this party down at Layla.举♥行♥派对You know, its that Moroccan restaurant.你应该来的You should come.那些话一出口我就后悔了The instant the words popped out of my mouth, I regretted them.我已经有计划了Uh, well, I. I made some plans already, but.不来没关系无所谓Or not. I mean just forget it.晚一点我可以去看看I could maybe stop by
26、later.好随便你Oh, fine. I mean, whatever.我可能会带某个人去Uh. I may bring someone.好Well, yeah, uh.带那个人一起来Come and bring that person.晚上见And maybe 1,11 see you later.再次谢谢你送的花And thank you again for the thoughtful flowers.真不敢相信I couldnrt believe it.我刚邀请前任男友和他的女伴来参加我的生日派对I had just invited my ex and his date to my
27、birthday party.仿佛老了一岁还不够悲惨似的As if getting older wasnt traumatic enough.当天下午在费玛鲁丁的办公室That afternoon in the office of Velma Rudin, 她是著名的心理学家也是“探索”这本书的作者 celebrated psychologist and author of In-To-Me-See, 是配偶间亲密关系的指南A Couples Guide To Intimacy莎曼珊尽力克制自己不要说出Samantha did her best not to say她知道不该说的话the on
28、e thing she knew she should not say.我们没有性生活了I cant help but notice that our sex life has diminished.一切正常不是吗?过一阵子Thats normal, isnt it? I mean, after a while.多久了?How long has it been?一个月-Um. -A month.别看得这么严重Dont take it all so seriously.好好享受性行为本身Have fun with your sexuality.你们试过性♥爱♥游戏吗?
29、Have you tried playing erotic games?莎曼珊想坦白说詹姆斯的命根子Samantha had a burning desire to confess that James had been从他们认识的那天起便一直玩捉迷藏playing Hide The Salami since the day they met.我只是最近没什么性♥欲♥Im just not feeling very sexual these days.我洗澡出来时看到你在自♥慰♥I saw you masturbating the oth
30、er day when I came out of the shower. 很多女人在性♥交♥时无法达到高♥潮♥Many women are simply unable to achieve orgasm through intercourse. 这没什么好难为情Its nothing to be ashamed of.你对做♥爱♥有很大的障碍I think you have a big problem with intimacy.-不是那样-不然是什么?-No, thatfs not it. -Then wh
31、at is it?没什么Its. its nothing. Nothing. Forget about it.你有什么感受尽管说Sweetheart, theres nothing you can say我不会在意的没什么-that can hurt me as long as its what youre feeling. -It*s nothing! 看来今天的时间到了That seems to be all the time we have for today.不错你们很努力Nice work, you two.下周同一时间好吗?Shall we say next week, same
32、time?我可以Good for me.莎曼珊?Samantha?想到每周固定要向费玛鲁丁报到The idea of seeing Velma in-to-me-seeu Rudin on a weekly basis 让莎曼珊无法忍♥受was much more than Samantha could bear.你的命根子太小了Your penis is too small.你说什么?Excuse me?它不能It doesn.-and it just.我办不到It cant. And I cant.它它实在是太小了And its. its just too damn smal
33、l.你有没有想过也许是你的阴♥道♥太大了 ?Did you ever stop to think that maybe your vagina is too big?我能说什么?我需要大老二What can I say. I need a big dick.我听到了I hear that.当莎曼珊为说了不该说的话付出代价时As Samantha paid the price of mentioning the unmentionable, 米兰达发现自♥由♥发言的代价Miranda discovered that free speech伴
34、随着发言本身而来comes with a cost of its own.我喜欢把手放在你的那话儿上理查睡着了Richards asleep. -Oh!在?好的-Be right back. -In the. okay.苏珊雪伦和她丈夫的公♥寓♥装♥修♥得很讲究Susan Sharon and her husband had one of those very adult我觉得自己像个16岁少女去朋友家玩apartments that made me feel like I was about sixteen她父母却认为visiting
35、the home of a friend whose parents我会带坏他们的孩子thought I was a bad influence.生日快乐凯莉? Happy birthday, Carrie ?生日快乐凯莉-? Happy birthday, Carrie ? -You didnft have to.我知道还没到一天啊-I know its a little early. -Look at you, jeez.苏珊雪伦好漂亮Oh, Susan Sharon, its beautiful.这是百分之百喀什米尔羊毛轻得像羽毛一样Its 100% Italian cashmere a
36、nd light as a feather.我好喜欢God, I love it.这是金钱的奇迹Itfs a cashmere-ical.你知道巴尼百货卖♥♥多少钱?You wouldnt believe what Barneys gets for this.-别告诉我-九百块-Oh, dont tell me. -Nine hundred dollars.九百块一条围巾?不会吧Nine hundred dollars for a scarf? No.我可以拿去退吗?换现金比较实在Listen, do you mind if I return it? I could
37、 really use the cash.有何不可?No, why not?你以为它为什么又称做“全是钱 ?Why do you think they call it cash-mere?到底在搞什么鬼?What the hell is going on?抱歉亲爱的I just love putting my hand around your cock.我喜欢听你说“那话儿”I just love hearing you say cock.你大而坚硬的那话儿Your big hard cock.那话儿Cock, cock, cock, cock.我以前为何说不出口?Why couldnt I
38、ever say that before?它只不过是一个词Its just a word.为什么我说的时候会让我们两个都兴奋起来?And why does it turn us both on when I say it?你还喜欢什么?What else do you like?你粗鲁的方式I like it when youre rough.当你把我的双腿举高跨过你的头时我便失去控制When you throw my legs over your head, I lose all control.我喜欢什么?Mm-hmm. And what do I like?你喜欢我咬你的乳&hearts
39、;头♥You like it when Fm biting your nipple.还有呢?Mm-hmm. And what else?你喜欢我亲吻你的蛋蛋You like it when Fm kissing your balls.继续说Oh, yeah, keep going.你更喜欢我把手指伸进你的屁♥眼♥And you really like it when I slip my finger in your ass.你说什么?Excuse me?你喜欢手指在你的屁♥眼♥里You just love a finger
40、in your ass.我怎么知道你喜欢手指在你的屁♥眼♥里How was I supposed to know that you love a finger in your ass 是不能在床上对男人说的话?is the one thing you can*t say to a man in bed?相信我不只那句话Trust me, thats not the only thing.可这是真的他很享受But its true, he enjoys it.很多男人都这样你不能提醒他们这一点-So do a lot of men. -But no, they enj
41、oy it, they just dont want it brought to their attention. 我个人是不喜欢屁♥眼♥里有任何东西Personally, I dont like anything in my ass.我知道你们会很惊讶And I know that may come as a surprise.我觉得被出♥卖♥♥♥I just feel so betrayed, you know.他试着要我讲些淫♥声♥浪♥语♥He tr
42、ied to get me to start talking dirty,我学会了then I got into it a little bit.然后他却把我推开And then he pulled the rug out from under me.男人真是反复无常Men are so frustratingly inconsistent.所以我才爱我的亨利Thats why I love my Henry.它充满热情Hes just a big love bug.还会舔我的脸You tell him anything and he just licks your face.夏洛特你可能太着
43、迷了Charlotte, you may be on to something.给寿星再来一杯加冰块的双份伏特加Waiter, another double vodka rocks for the birthday girl, please.伏特加是我唯一的盟友The truth was vodka was my only ally.大人物随时会带着他迷人的女伴At any moment, Big was just gonna walk right in here with his gorgeous date,走进来对我微笑说着smile at me like some distant str
44、anger and say something absolutely crushing like.生日快乐宝贝Happy birthday, baby.很高兴你能赶上Hey, glad you could make it.无法待很久Cant stay long.骆驼在外面等Left my camel outside.凯莉你还记得杰克吧?Oh. Carrie, you remember Jack, right?杰克?Jack?你要带的人就是他?You mean, Jack is your date?我没有意识到Well, I wasnt aware that we were formally d
45、ating.见到你真好-But now that you.-It is so good to see you again.你最近怎么样?How have you been?妙不可言婆娘伤了我的心Marvelous, just split up with a bitch who broke my heart.起码她没骗走我的钱At least she didnt get my money.祝我生日快乐Well, happy birthday to me.一小时后我“天方夜谭”式的生日派对An hour later, my Arabian Nights fantasy birthday变成了“午夜快车”suddenly felt like Midnight Express.你好吗?How are you?好极了你呢?Great. How are you?也很好Good. Fine.那好Good.不好意思你前男友来你生日派对是干嘛的?Excuse me. What is your ex