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1、欲望城市（性♥爰♥专家凯莉布雷萧并且勇于发问）“诚实为上策？”对米兰达而言比三十四岁当伴娘更糟糕的事For Miranda, the only thing worse than being Charlottes 34-year-old bridesmaid就是当一个没有男伴的三十四岁伴娘was being a 34-year-old bridesmaid without a date.婚礼即将在一周之内来临With the wedding less than a week away,米兰达掉了进纽约单身族群最大的诱惑.Miranda fell prey to the
2、 siren song of a New York singles1 event.约会介绍所.multi-dating.只要二十块钱就有七次小约会Twenty dollars bought you seven mini-dates,每次八分钟大约就是each eight minutes long, which, incidentally,一次相亲需要的时间is about as long as most blind dates should be.你好我是米兰达霍布斯Hi, Im Miranda Hobbes.我是杜彳来欧文Dwight Owens.摩根士丹利投顾公♥司&hear
3、ts;Private wealth group at Morgan Stanley.私人财富团队负责个人及养老基金Investment management for high net-worth individuals and a couple of pension plans.我喜欢我的工作任职五年了Like my job, been there five years,离过婚没有小孩无信仰divorced, no kids, not religious.住在新泽西会说法文和葡萄牙文I live in New Jersey, speak French and Portuguese.毕业于沃顿商
4、学院Wharton Business School.有任何吸引你的地方吗？Any of this appealing to you?当然会说葡萄牙文很罕见Sure, Portuguese, thats impressive.非常感谢自我介绍一下吧曼娣？Obrigado! What about you, Mandy?Just an ending. The end of dating!好吧Alright then!是换个人上♥床♥也许会更好”的结束Its also the end of the possibility that your next great fuck
5、is just around the corner.我下一次的Well, my next great.什么？-说吧-Yes? Say it! Say it!美好性经验就要来临.fuck.is just around the corner.我终于可以跟崔上♥床♥ 了I finally get to sleep with Trey!你说什么？Excuse me?你还没跟他睡过？You havent slept with him yet?亲爱的买♥♥车前也得试试车的性能吧Honey, before you buy the car, you ta
6、ke it for a test drive.我想要将自己保留到新婚之夜Well, I wanted to save myself until we got married.亲爱的你不是处♥女♥But, sweetie, youre not a virgin.我这一段感情是很浪漫的Well, I am in this relationship, and I think its romantic.等他不得其门而入Yeah, its romantic until he cant figure out where to put it in.不会的No.要是他很蹩脚呢？Ho
7、ney, what if hes terrible?他不可能蹩脚的He wonft be terrible.他的吻功了得No, he is an amazing kisser.-真的？ 他很性感-Really? -And hes so sexy,而且爱我and he loves me.我想为他做点特别的事And I wanna do things to him that I have never done to anybody.前几晚Like the other night, 我考虑把全身涂满生奶油I was thinking about putting whipped cream all o
8、ver my body.脱脂生奶油是最佳选择Low-fat Cool Whip is the best.没有别的牌子那么粘Its less sticky than other brands.脱脂生奶油Low-fat Cool Whip.不敢相信你们还没上过床I cant believe you havent slept with him.已经It*s been.等太久了我好饥渴too long! I am so horny!饥渴Horny.稍后不当新娘的人Later, those of us not getting married“找炮♥友♥”来庆祝单身生活 cel
9、ebrated our singleness with a booty call. 很高兴你打来了Im so glad you called.一有空就打了As soon as I landed.莎曼珊把“直的硬是舔成横的”And Samantha had a vertical scotch tasting that turned into a horizontal one. 我不知道纽约人这么友善I had no idea you Americans were so bloody friendly-like.他说的话很难懂She had a hard time understanding hi
10、m, 不过绝对是条“硬”汉but she understood he was hard.之后在市区我决定爬上艾登的床Later, downtown, I decided to crawl into bed with Aidan.但是他并不在床上.but he wasn*t in his bed.美人儿你怎么会来？Hey, beautiful. What brings you down here?想给你一个惊喜I was trying to surprise you.很难给养狗的人惊喜You cant surprise a man with a dog.看得出来I see that.你在做什么？
11、What are you working on there?结婚贺礼The wedding gift.送给夏洛特和崔的？This is for Charlotte and Trey?你说想送他们我的家具You said you wanted to give them a piece of my furniture.没错但是你不需要亲手做Yeah, I didnt mean you had to make something.挑一个就好了We could have just picked a piece.你猜怎么着这些全部都是我亲手做的Well, guess what? I make all t
12、hat stuff, too.我知道不过这样.Yeah, I know, but this is.太有诚意了This is too nice.我希望礼物别具意义Well, I wanted it to mean something.老天我本来还想送他们牛排刀God, I was about to get them steak knives.好吧这有什么意义？Okay, what does it mean?这是情人座Welt its a love seat.看得出来That I get.这是两种来自于不同树木的木头Its two different types of wood from two
13、different trees.混在一起变得更强They blend together and make it stronger.就像Just like, umm.混合的酒A mixed drink?也像两个恋爰的人Kinda like two people in love.-没错-你要取笑它吗？-Right, that too. -Are you gonna make fun of this?不这实在是No, its really.最棒的礼物了Nicer than anyone deserves.你有看到这一个吗？You see this piece?这上面有个大瑕疵This big old
14、 flaw right here, 不能算是缺点its not a flaw really, its just.这是这种树木的特色Its just the way the wood is, 很有趣很漂亮I think its interesting. Kind of beautiful.缺点也可以是好的？So flaws can be good?缺点是最棒的部分Flaws are the best part.现在是告诉他的好时机This was the time to tell him.我的话就要脱口而出I could feel the words bubbling up inside me,
15、 但要是我告诉他他还会爱我吗？but if I told him, could he still love me?我还没准备好知道I wasn*t ready to find out.那一晚还有另一件找炮♥友♥事件There was another booty call that night.亲爰的Hi, sweetie-kins.夏洛特约克你醉了吗？Charlotte York, are you drunk?对我醉了崔麦克道格Yes, yes, I am, Trey MacDougal.今天And, today,是我们大喜之日is officially our w
16、edding day.我再也等不及了And I cant wait any longer.我们能不能现在就做♥爱♥ ?Can we please make love right now?你确定？ 我确定-Are you sure? -Oh, yes, yes, yes, I am.马上带我到你的卧房♥Take me to your bedroom now.好的Alrighty then.真是遗憾Well, that was unfortunate.这种情形以前发生过吗？Has this.Has this ever happened to you bef
17、ore? 偶尔Every now and then.我没想到跟你也会这样I just didnt think it would happen with you.没什么大不了的I mean, its no big deal.有时候我就是没办法性♥交♥Sometimes intercourse just doesnt do it for me.我的帆可以扬起You know, I can get the sails up, 就是驶不进港口but I just can*t bring it into the harbor.我能做些什么吗？Is there anything
18、 I can do?有的Yes, there is.什么？What?你可以嫁给我You can marry me.我已经这么做了Im already doing that.夏洛特我爱你I love you, Charlotte.性对我们来说只是一小部分And sex is such a small part of it for us.我就是爰你这一点You know, thats what I love about you.我们之间不只是性Its not just about the sex.夏洛特整晚不能成眠Charlotte couldnt sleep at all that night.
19、我也是And neither could I.我不断地想着我是背叛者All I could think about was the fact that I was a cheater.我在五年级时说谎作弊I cheated and lied in fifth grade,我现在还是一样and I was still doing it.这样下去是不行的This isnt gonna work.什么意思？我们吗？What do you mean, us?你不能凌晨三点偷溜出来抽烟We cant have you sneaking out here, 3:00 in the morning ever
20、y time you want a cigarette. 我试着戒烟就是戒不掉I tried to quit, I just couldnt.这样的话Well.我只好试着接受了I guess PH just have to learn to live with it.你说你不跟抽烟的人约会的But you said you couldnt date a smoker.你不只是个抽烟的人Youre not just a smoker.你对我意义重大Youre a lot of things.我并不完美And Im not perfect.是吗？你有什么缺点？Oh, yeah? What*s yo
21、ur flaw?你告诉我You tell me.我不知道I dont know.我又撒了个谎That was another lie.我知道他的缺点是什么I knew what his flaw was.那就是真心相信我It was trusting me with his heart.艾登我有事告诉你Aidan, I need to tell you something.什么事？What?突然间我没有勇气告诉他But, suddenly, I couldnt tell him.我怕他再也不会这样看着我了I was afraid that if I did, hed never look at
22、 me that way again.所以我没告诉他So, I didnt.我爱你I love you.我也爱你I love you, too.我们进去睡觉吧Lets go back and go to bed.不我应该回家了No, I should get home.我要参加婚礼的东西在家里My stuff s at home. My stuff for the wedding.我是首席女伴郎要上得了台面Im the maid of honor, I need to be presentable.好吧我跟你去Alright； Til come with you.不了你留在这里No, no,
23、stay here, just.早上去接我just pick me up in the morning.我去拿衣服我得走了PH get my stuff, I have to go.婚礼要正式穿着吗？我没有晚礼服Is this wedding black tie, because I dont have a tux.新郎会穿苏格兰裙Well, the groom is in a kilt,所以我觉得so, I think pretty much.怎么了？ 我切到手指了-What happened? -Oh, I cut my finger.老天-Jesus! -Ahh.没有关系这种事常发生It
24、s okay, it happens.比在高空遇到气流时做早餐好多了I mean, you havent made breakfast till youve made it at 10,000 feet in turbulence.真的流血了你看Man, itrs really bleeding. Look at this.我看到了I saw it, I saw it, oh.-我该怎么力?-我不知道-What should I do? -I dont know.伤口好深需要缝针吗？God, its deep, you think I need stitches?我不知道不要在我面前晃I do
25、n*t know, will you stop putting it in my face?我看伤得很严重你看Well, I think its really bad, look!不要这样Stop it, stop it!血让我不舒服Blood makes me queasy!但你是医生But youre a doctor.不是吗？Arent you?不是Not really, no.那你是什么？What are you then?运动器材店的助理经理Assistant Manager of The Athletes Foot at 81st and Broadway.你说谎？So, you
26、lied?我很抱歉Im sorry.我一直很想跟空姐上♥床♥I just always wanted to sleep with a stewardess.那一刻米兰达想说出实话For a brief moment Miranda considered coming clean,但是这样他们两个都成了骗子but then theyd both be liars,他和她的空姐梦都会破碎and he wouldnt have slept with a stewardess, and she wouldnt have been one.你该走了哈李斯I think you
27、 should go, Harris.我希望不会在飞机上遇到你And I hope I never have you on one of my flights.我不可能坐头等舱的Well, I wouldnrt be on first class.当然不可能No, you wouldnt.我快迟到了夏洛特不会原谅我的Hey, Im running late and Charlotte will never forgive me. I just need to.那是什么？Hey, whats that?结婚小贺礼It*s the wedding gift.情人座包装得真好That love se
28、at packs up nice.这是一台拍立得-Its a Polaroid. -Oh.你这样的伴娘太性感了吧You look too hot to be a bridesmaid.我以为要穿得很丑尽出洋相I thought the whole point was to.wear a bad dress and be humiliated.这不是那种婚礼Its not that kind of wedding.或许有一天我会为我们做一张情人座I thought maybe one day Id build us a love seat.也许吧-Maybe. -Yeah?我们会迟到的我去拿我的
29、Alright, were gonna be late. Tm just gonna grab my.我十分钟前就该到达教堂的I was supposed to be at the church ten minutes ago.你都不让我抱了You never let me hold you anymore.你为什么一直躲避我？Oh. Why do you keep running away?我没有躲避你Im not running away.你在怕什么？What are you afraid of?艾登我跟我前男友上♥床♥ 了Aidan, I slept with
30、 my ex-boyfriend.你在家具展上见过他然后我就跟他上♥床♥了You met him at the furniture show, and then we slept together, 我没有告诉你我很抱歉and I didnt tell you and Im sorry.你跟那个人上♥床♥ ?You slept with that guy?在我们交往期间？When we were going out?一次？Once?不止一次No, more than once.他已婚真是一团糟And he was married, and
31、 it was a mess,我不知道我在想什么我什么都没有想and I dont know what I was thinking. I wasnt thinking.一切都结束了But, it is so, so over,我做错了and I. and it was wrong, and I just.我希望你可以I just hope you can.拿去我想静一静Here, I think I want to be alone.婚礼怎么为?What about the wedding?你自己去Just go without me.我去散散步Im gonna take a walk.待会
32、儿到那里找我好吗？Will you meet me there later?米兰达不要把血滴在我婚纱上Miranda, please dont bleed on my dress.是米兰达Um, Miranda.我是一家中型事务所的律师Im a lawyer at a mid-size firm,最近升格为合伙人actually, I was recently made partner.我是律师Im a lawyer.我是律师毕业于哈佛法学院I went to Harvard Law School.我是空姐Im a stewardess.真的吗？Really?在正式的婚礼前有一个彩排晚宴But
33、 before the wedding bells, theres the rehearsal dinner.你说你是空姐You said you were a stewardess?我在证实一项理论I was testing a theory.什么理论？The theory being?男人畏惧有权力的工作Men are threatened by powerful jobs.他们不喜欢律师他们要They dont want a lawyer, they want a.一个骗子Liar!我才是骗子I was the liar.我终于结束与大人物的关系rd finally ended my a
34、ffair with Big,但是欺骗艾登的罪恶感让我无法入睡but the guilt of lying to Aidan was like a hangover I couldnt sleep off.我就这么说身为一个律师兼合伙人Im just saying； as a lawyer, a partner, no less,没有人要跟我约会如果当一个空姐我明天就有约I got zero dates, and as a stewardess, I got one for tomorrow night.正确说法应该是“空服员I believe the correct term is flig
35、ht attendant.1要是想上♥床♥就不能这么说我尽量Im trying not to.-时间到了-凯莉在哪里？-Here we go! -Where is Carrie?她一定会到的Shell be here.夏洛特我祖母的项链在你身上真是好看Oh, Charlotte, my grandmothers necklace looks beautiful on you.邦妮让我护送你到座位吧Bunny.can I escort you to your seat-like, you know?你说什么？Excuse me?他想护送你到座位上He asked if
36、 he could escort you to your seat.当然Oh, certainly.该是时候了I guess its time.顺带一提他们在苏格兰裙下还有穿东西By the way, they do wear something under those kilts.不过很好脱就是了But itrs easy to get off.婚礼上什么都有了The wedding was complete.夏洛特有旧的有新的有借来的Charlotte had something old, something new, something borrowed,还有莎曼珊吹过的and some
37、one Samantha blew.凯莉-Carrie! -Ah!抱歉我迟到了Im sorry Im so late.没关系很高兴你来了Its okay, Im just glad youre here.天你看起来美极了Jeez, you look perfect.说真的？Honestly?真的Honestly.该走了We should go.-好-快点-Oh, right. -Come on, you.好Okay.虽然有点暴躁Despite all her bitching,莎曼珊当伴娘还真乐在其中Samantha actually enjoyed being a bridesmaid.米兰
38、达重回自我后在最后一刻找到了男伴And, Miranda, back to being herself, found a last minute date.凯莉Carrie.我有事情告诉你I have to tell you something.现在吗？Right now?对Yeah.崔硬不起来Trey cant get it up.什么？What?我们睡过了他硬不起来We slept together last night and he couldnt get it up!他有喝醉吗？Was he drunk?我喝醉了他很清醒No, I was drunk, he was fine.应该是为
39、了婚礼而紧张Well, then, it must have been wedding night jitters.他说这种事时而发生He says it happens sometimes.既然她都披上婚纱了Since she was already in the big white dress,我决定说个善意的谎言I reached for a little white lie.这种事常发生Hey. Happens to everybody.我第一次约会就该跟他上♥床♥的I just should have slept with him the first da
40、te.或许在你去之前他打过手♥枪♥Maybe he jerked off right before you got there, 他只是不好意思告诉你and he was just too embarrassed to tell you.我真的爱他他也爱你-I do love him. -And he loves you.或许他真的打了手♥枪♥Maybe he did jerk off.亲爰的听着Listen, Charlotte, sweetie, 要是你不想结婚就不要结婚if you dont wanna go through thi
41、s, you don*t have to.我们可以跳上计程车其他人也只好接受事实Alright, well just get a cab and everyone will just have to get over it. 不我要结婚No.Im getting married.好走吧Okay. Go.没问题Okay.凯莉Carrie!过来Come here.不要告诉别人Dont tell anyone.好快走Okay. Go!三十四岁的夏洛特单身Charlotte was 34, single,穿着一万四千元的婚纱and standing in a $14,000 dress.就要结婚了Sh
42、e was getting married.即使没有性生活也阻止不了她And not even a low libido could stop her.帮我拿一下好吗？Okay, could you hold this for a second for me?没问题Sure.乂登Hey, you.我四处走了快一小时I walked around this block for about an hour.就是没办法说服自己进去I couldnt bring myself to go in.我很抱歉艾登Im so sorry, Aidan.我知道I know it.我无心伤害你I never me
43、ant to hurt you.我知道I know.但我仍然伤害你了我很抱歉But I did. Im sorry.这件事不能跟木头一样吗？Couldnt it be like the wood?这是我的缺点And thats my flaw, and, and.而你是另一种木头And youre the other wood, and that.能让我们之间更坚强that makes it stronger.没有这么简单凯莉Its just not that simple, Carrie.我希望我永远不知情I just wish I didnt know about this.我只是想对你坦
44、诚I just wanted to be honest with you.人都会犯错And people make mistakes.我了解我自己I just know myself.我无法克服这一类的事情This isnt the kind of thing I can get over.我需要一个人静一静I just need to be on my own for a while.就我一个人Be on my own.我是真的爱你I really loved you.凯莉要拍照了Carrie, they need us for photos.马上来Okay.我告诉他了I told him.让我来解决这个问题Let me straighten that out.要找到不管发生什么都一样爰你的人不容易Its hard to find people who will love you no matter what.要拍了微笑Here we go, nice!你们都好漂亮Everybody looks beautiful.我很幸运地找到三个I was lucky enough to find three of them.Not if you wanna get laid. 重要的是你说话的方式Hon, it doesnt matter what yo