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1、高考读后续写素材积累：动作与神态描写1 Nana collapsing suddenly,her bodytightening,becoming rigid(僵硬的),her eyes rolling back,her arms and legsshakingas if something were throttling(压制)her from the inside,the froth(泡沫)at the corners of her mouth, white, sometimes pink with blood.描述可怜的Nana发病时的状态：her body-tightening,beco
2、ming rigid(僵硬的)；her eyes- rolling back；her arms and legs- shaking；the froth(泡沫)at the corners of her mouth-white, sometimes pink with blood.作者从Nana身体的各个部位进行描述，给人以真实感,人物造型栩栩如生,使文章生动形象。2 When Mariam spoke, his attention never wavered动摇. Henodded slowlyandsmiled with a look of gratitude, as ifhe had be
3、en granted a coveted渴望的privilege. It was easy to tell Mullah Faizullah things that Mariam didnt dare tell Nana.本句描述了师生的关系和谐，其中在描述老师倾听Mariam讲话时的神态特别形象：nodded slowlyandsmiled with a look of gratitude描写动作时，为了让动作更丰满，更灵动，可以适当运用副词，介词短语等来补充说明。比如本句中：nodded slowly；根据情景我们还可以用 nodding quickly等等。再比如，在表达微笑的时候，本句
4、中smiled with a look of gratitude=smile gratefully；根据情景，还可以有smile broadly,开怀地笑。smile charmingly 迷人地笑.smile cunningly 狡猾地笑。smile pleasantly 令人愉快地笑smile faintly 微微一笑；等等。3 “Is that what you want?” Mullah Faizullah said,looking at her with his soft, watery eyes,his hands behind his stooping back, the sha
5、dow of his turban falling on a patch of bristling buttercups.对老师讲话时的神态描写：眼睛looking at her with his soft, watery eyes手：his hands behind his stooping back4 When she laughed, shecovered her mouth with a fist to hide the bad tooth.娜娜笑的时候的神态描写：covered her mouth with a fist to hide the bad tooth. 用拳头盖住她的嘴
6、巴以掩饰她糟糕的牙齿，体现了她爱美，又不太自信的神态。5 Shewaited until her legs were stiff(坚硬的). This time, she did not go back to the kolba.Sherolled up the legs of her trousers to the knees,crossedthe stream, and, for the first time in her life,headed downthe hill for Herat 赫拉特(阿富汗西北部城市)用动作表达她内心的挣扎与果敢：waited until her legs
7、 were stiff(坚硬的)rolled up the legs of her trouserscrossedthe streamheaded down6 Finally, on Thursdays, all she could do was sit against a wall,eyes glued to the stream, and wait. If Jalil was running late,a terrible dread filled her bit by bit. Her knees would weaken, and she would have togo somewhe
8、re and lie down.等候父亲的神态描写：eyes glued to the stream体现了她的渴望;a terrible dread filled her bit by bit;Her knees would weaken;.go somewhere and lie down用具体的身体反应与动作表达她的恐惧与焦虑。7A look of confusion crossedthe girls face. Then,a flash of recognition. There wasa faint smileon her lips now, andan air of eagernes
9、sabout her, of anticipation. “Wait here,” the girlsaid quickly.神态的细微变化：先是A look of confusion crossedthe girls face然后a flash of recognition.之后是a faint smile再是an air of eagerness最后是the girlsaid quickly.一连串的神态变化，细微的表情特写，最后辅以动作。就像是看电影，有木有？8 Sheswungher feet over the side of the bed and hurriedover. Shek
10、issedhis hand as always andhe her brow. Shepulledhim upa chair.一连串的动作描写：swung - hurriedover-kissed-he her brow(kiss)-pulledhim up这一连串的动作将玛丽亚姆对父亲到来的热情与爱表达出来了。9 Jalils eyeslifted slowly,met Mariams, lingeredfor a moment, then dropped.Heopened his mouth,but all that came forth wasa single, pained groan
11、.细腻的神态描写：父亲Jalil的反应：Jalils eyes-lifted slowly-met Mariams- lingeredfor a moment-dropped-opened his mouth-a single, pained groan 描写了父亲对女儿要出嫁的复杂心情，这些动作描写表现了人物的内心世界，以外显内。10 Their gazesmet brieflyin the glass andslid away.细腻的神态描写：陌生不自在的碰撞：met briefly - slid away11 Hecrossed and uncrossedhis arms.他手臂交叉在胸
12、前，又放了下来。动作描写：将一组相对的词“交叉cross与 使不交叉，放下uncross”放在一起表达，表达了人物的矛盾心理。12 Jalillooked down, and, like an overgrown child,dug atsomething with the toe of his shoe.Jalil ，（玛丽亚姆的父亲）朝下看，用鞋尖磨蹭地面什么的dug at something with the toe of his shoe。本句用了比喻的手法，like an overgrown child就像一个大孩子，形象地描写了父亲感到愧疚的神态。13Alone in the ho
13、use, Mariampaced restlessly, from the kitchen to the living room, up the steps to her room and down again. Sheended up backin her room,doing her prayers or sittingon the bed,missingher mother,feelingnauseated and homesick.描述Mariam一个人在家无聊的场景一、动作的不断变换：不安地走动paced restlessly；ended up back返回；doing her pr
14、ayers 祈祷or sittingon the bed坐在床上, 同时想念母亲missingher mother.想家feelingnauseated and homesick.二、场景的不断变换from the kitchen to the living room从厨房到客厅, up the steps to her room and down again去楼上房间又下来.这些并不是累赘的文字，这些文字让读者更加了解玛丽亚姆在家无所事事百无聊赖的心情。 我们似乎看到了玛丽亚姆在陌生的家里孤单的身影。14Shepusheduntil somehow she was in the clear
15、and then sheran upthe street. It wasnt until shedreachedthe intersection that sherealizedshed run the wrong way. Sheturned aroundand ran backin the other direction,headed down,trippingonce andscraping her knee badly, then up again andrunning, boltingpast the women.形象地描述Mariam慌不择路的窘态：逃跑，方向错了，返回跑，又摔倒受
16、伤了。15Hegaveher awounded look.经过一系列的事情，玛丽亚姆感觉父亲并不真正爱她，内心极度受挫极为伤心。她说她永远不要听到他消息。这时，父亲伤心地望了她一眼。这一眼，体现了父亲怎样复杂的感情呢？16“Dont leave like this,” hesaid in a thin voice.玛丽亚姆憎恨父亲将她嫁出去，拒绝与父亲交流。在出嫁那天与父亲分别时，态度冷漠，于是父亲软弱无力地说：别这样离开我。用thin这个词来表达他内心的那种伤感，内疚与心虚。17Rasheedburiedhis face into her pillow, and Mariamstared,w
17、ide-eyed, at the ceiling above his shoulder,shivering, lipspursed, feeling the heat of his quick breaths on her shoulder.描述玛丽亚姆与丈夫首次身体的接触，后面几句都是类似的。大家可以酌情处理。这类描述也可以用在其他情景中，如某人很兴奋，很恐惧等。18 His hand was on her right breast now, squeezing it hard through the blouse, and she could hear himbreathing deepl
18、y through the nose.19.There was a moment of hesitation, and then his hand was on her neck, his thick fingersslowly pressingthe knobs in the back of it. His thumbslid down, and now it was stroking the hollow above her collarbone, then the flesh beneath it. Mariam began shivering. His handcreptlower s
19、till, lower, his fingernails catching in the cotton of her blouse.20Mariamclosedher eyes,gritted her teeth（咬紧牙关）.21.Mariam sat on his bed, embarrassed and confused. She cupped her face with her hands and closed her eyes. She breathed and breathed until she felt calmer.神态描写：困扰与尴尬。作者是这样描述的：双手捧住脸，闭上眼睛c
20、upped her face with her hands and closed her eyes. 然后她不断地呼吸直到感觉平静些She breathed and breathed until she felt calmer。这种具体的神态与动作描写把她的尴尬与困惑形象地表达出来了。22 Hunger made him curt, irritable, impatient.饥饿带来的反应。简单粗暴，易怒，没有耐心：curt, irritable, impatient.23 Meanwhile, a change had come over Rasheed ever since the day
21、 at the bathhouse. Most nights when he came home, he hardly talked anymore. He ate, smoked, went to bed, sometimes came back in the middle of the night for a brief and, of late, quite rough session of coupling.玛丽亚姆丈夫Rasheed在她流产后，对她的态度发生了极大变化。回家后，很少讲话。他就是吃饭，抽烟。上床睡觉，或者午夜回家一会儿。动作描写很简单ate, smoked, went
22、to bed,，但我们能深刻体会到这种压抑的生活氛围，以及玛丽亚姆在这种环境下生存，该多么不易。24 Occasionally, he took her around town on Fridays, like he used to, but on the sidewalks he walked quickly and always a few steps ahead of her, without speaking, unmindful of Mariam who almost had to run to keep up with him. He wasnt so ready with a
23、laugh on these outings anymore. He didnt buy her sweets or gifts, didnt stop and name places to her as he used to. Her questions seemed to irritate him.丈夫Rasheed 在她流产后的又一表现：带她上街少了Occasionally, he took her around town 。即使在街上，走路很快，不顾玛丽亚姆能否跟上。事实上，玛丽亚姆跟不上，要跑着才能跟上他walked quickly and always a few steps ah
24、ead of her, without speaking, unmindful of Mariam who almost had to run t。而且不讲话，不买礼物给她了，也不停下来介绍地名给她didnt buy her sweets or gifts, didnt stop and name places to her as he used to，玛丽亚姆如果问问题，似乎也会激怒他 irritate him。足见他的不耐烦，以及对玛丽亚姆的嫌弃。他对玛丽亚姆已经没有爱了。25 He didnt look at her when he said this. These days, he n
25、ever did anymore, and Mariam wasnt ever sure if she was being spoken to.丈夫Rasheed对玛丽亚姆的冷漠的态度：说话不看她，而且有一段时间了，He didnt look at her when he said this. These days, he never did anymore,这相当于冷暴力。26 It wasnt easy tolerating him talking this way to her, to bear his scorn, his ridicule, his insults, his walk
26、ing past her like she was nothing but a house cat. 可怜的Mariam要容忍丈夫对她的冷漠与侮辱: bear his scorn, his ridicule, his insults；这里多个his的重复，是修辞中的平行对照手法，形式整齐匀称，音律节奏铿锵，富有感染力。在灿烂千阳中，类似的句子表达有很多。在这里，我们可以感受到她丈夫对待她就像房子里的一只猫，不把她当人看待，让我们对玛丽亚姆的命运产生深深的同情。27 He put it in his mouth, chewed once, then twice, before grimacing
27、（做鬼脸） and spitting it out on the sofrah.描写玛丽亚姆丈夫吃饭的时候吃到沙粒时的反应：前面咀嚼一次两次，然后是他做鬼脸吐出那口饭。是一个特写的镜头。为之后他大发雷霆，毒打玛丽亚姆做铺垫。28 His powerful hands clasped her jaw. He shoved two fingers into her mouth and pried it open, then forced the cold, hard pebbles into it. Mariam struggled against him, mumbling, but he ke
28、pt pushing the pebbles in, his upper lip curled in a sneer.丈夫对Mariam的残忍行为：强行将沙砾塞到她嘴巴里forced the cold, hard pebbles ；kept pushing the pebbles in.，不顾玛丽亚姆的反抗与痛苦。具体的事件描写，揭示现实的残酷。29 Tears were leaking out of the corners of her eyes.流眼泪的表达：眼泪从她的眼角流出来leaking out of the corners of her eyes。30 .A few moments
29、 later, he pushed back the blanket and left the room, leaving her with the impression of his head on her pillow, leaving her to wait out the pain down below, to look at the frozen stars in the sky and a cloud that draped the face of the moon like a wedding veil.玛丽亚姆的丈夫是很自私的，其实从头到尾没有真正爱过他。她只是他泄欲的工具。这段话出现在玛丽亚姆刚与丈夫结婚的时候。学科网（北京）股份有限公司