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1、作文评析作文评析Part-time Jobs观点对比型观点对比型BY group4主讲：主讲：Calvin Yang行文流程行文流程1.描述现象在现实生活中大致反映，引出全文2.正（反）观点的对比论述3.我的观点行文中出现的主要问题行文中出现的主要问题1.文章主要以短句为主，让文章显得逻辑连接性不强2.语句、段落之间关联度不够，逻辑性不强3.chiglish较为严重，书面语、口语分不清楚4.模板问题比较严重，主要都选择一个模板行文中的普遍问题行文中的普遍问题1.think一词的乱用2.moreandmore（万恶词组）3.单词多次重复出现，没有替换4.没有标点符号，不分大小写5.单复数问题6.
2、语法不清楚7.句法不清楚Solution NO.1（main problem）文章行文中应长短句结合搭配，抑扬顿挫，这样会使得改卷老师认为你的英语水平较高，同时文章的层次就出来了e.g.Mostofushaveformed anunrealisticpicture oflifeonadesertisland.Wesometimesimagineadesertislandto be a sort of paradisewherethesunalwaysshines.Lifethereissimpleandgood.Ripefruitfallsfromthetreesandyouneverhave
3、towork.The other side of the picture is quite the opposite.Lifeonadesertislandiswretched.YoueitherstarvetodeathorlivelikeRobinsonCrusoe,waitingforaboatwhichnevercomes.Perhaps there is an element of truth in both these pictures,butfewofushavehadtheopportunitytofindout.-Newconcept3Lesson12Life on a de
4、sert islandSummery模板;结构：总-分（正面-过度-反面）-总总;.haveformeddifferentideas/opinionson分：someholdthat(用词：maintain,view,beconvinced)列举原因：forthesimplereasonthatTheotherperspectiveisquitetheopposite.Theyarguethat.Accordingtothem(whatsmore,inaddition,moreover)总：Perhapsthereisanelementoftruthinboththeseopinions,1.
5、butIwouldmaintainamoderate/neutralattitude2.butIwouldagreemoreontheformer/latteroneexampleTheyhaveformeddifferentideasonthistopic.Someholdthatchildrenaresupposedtodosoforthesimplereasonthatinchildhoodtheygetgoodmemoryandthatearlystudycanlaythefoundationforfurtherstudyinthefuture.Theotherperspectivei
6、squitetheopposite.TheyarguethatitisnotsuitableforchildrentostartEnglishstudyasearlyaschildhood.Accordingtothem,learningEnglishandChineseatthesametimemaygiverisetoconfusion,whichwillexertnegativeinfluenceonthestudyefficiencyofbothlanguages.Perhapsthereisanelementoftruthinbothopinions,butnoresulthasbe
7、enachievedyetinthediscussion.Solution NO.2（main problem）Thesilencewassuddenlybrokenwhenalargecar,withitsheadlightsonanditshornblaring,roareddownthearcade.Itcametoastopoutsidethejewelers.Onemanstayedatthewheelwhiletwootherswithblackstockingsovertheirfacesjumpedoutandsmashedthewindowoftheshopwithironb
8、ars.Whilethiswasgoingon,MrTaylorwasupstairs.Heandhisstaffbeganthrowingfurnitureoutofthewindow.Chairsandtableswentflyingintothearcade.Oneofthethieveswasstruckbyaheavystatue,buthewastoobusyhelpinghimselftodiamondstonoticeanypain.Theraidwasalloverinthreeminutes,forthemenscrambledbackintothecaranditmove
9、doffatafantasticspeed.Justasitwasleaving,MrTaylorrushedoutandranafteritthrowingashtraysandvases,butitwasimpossibletostopthethieves.Theyhadgotawaywiththousandsofpoundsworthofdiamonds.-Newconcept3Lesson6Smash-and-grabSolution NO.3（main problem）1.nomatter(regardless of)you areinschoolornot2.studentscan
10、understandthatmoneycouldntcomeeasily(money cannot be easily earned)3.extraworkmaymaketheirbodybad(lead to a disease which can be harmful to their healthy)4.withtheincreasingneed(demond)ofsociety5.intodays(current)society/worldSolution NO.4（main problem）1.Ithinktheadvantagesoutweighthanthedisadvantag
11、es.2.Astome3.AsfarasImconcerned4.AsacollegestudentSolution:多背模板，排列组合！多背模板，排列组合！Thinkv.1.认为,以为2.想,思索,构思;考虑3.想出,想起4.感到5.猜想,想像Think替换词替换词reasonconsiderSupposeAssumeBelieveImagineAgreeJudgesenseMore and more不要再用不要再用 more and more了；该词组被评了；该词组被评为中国恶俗词组榜第一！为中国恶俗词组榜第一！a growing/increasing number of.Inevitab
12、le nevtb()l不可避免的不可避免的ProgressivelygraduallyMore and more拓展拓展Themore.,themore.句型1.“themore.,themore.”句型常表示“越就越”,是一个复合句,其中前面的句子是状语从句,后面的句子是主句。the用在形容词或副词的比较级前,more代表形容词或副词的比较级。例如:Themorehegets,themorehewants.2.themore.,themore.句型,主从句的时态常用一般现在时或一般过去时。例如:Thehigherthegroundis,thethinnerairbecomes.The mor
13、e.,the more.句型句型3.若主句的谓语动词用一般将来时,从句的谓语动词要用一般现在时表示将来。例如:Theharderyouwork,thegreaterprogressyouwillmake.4.若比较级作表语且不位于句首时,可以不用the。例如:Whenwearemoreindanger,weshouldbebraver.5.在这种句型中,主句在程度上随着从句变化而变化,常把被强调部分提前。例如:Thefasteryourun,thebetteritwillbe.The more.,the more.句型句型6.这种句型的特点是前后都可以有所省略。特别是谚语、俗语,只要意义明确,
14、越简练越好。例如:Themore,thebetter.多多益善。7.这种句型中的比较部分通常是状语、宾语、表语,也可以是主语。例如:ThemoreEnglishyoupractise,thebetteryourEnglishis.The more.,the more.句型句型8.若表示越越不时,常用themore.,theless.句型。例如:Themoresheflattersme,thelessIlikeher.9.若表示越不就越时,常用theless.,themore.句型。例如:Thelessheworried,thebetterheworked.替换替换healthy:fitwell
15、strongvigorousbeneficialnutritious(反义词：sickunhealthyill)Improve:promote,advance,enhance,Strengthen,facilitate,boost(反义词：worsenwaste)替换替换rich:wealthyproductiveindigestibleintense(反义词：poorshabbylackinglightweak)perfect:Adj.faultlessidealpreciseexact(反义词：flawedincompletewrong)surprising:astonishingasto
16、undingamazingshockingstartlingunexpectedunanticipatedextraordinaryremarkable(反义词：expected)替换替换outstanding:exceptionalterrificwonderfulmarvelousexcellentgreatremarkable(反义词：abysmalsettled)big:largespaciousextensiveoldertall(反义词：smallnarrowlittleshort)great:hugefamousnoblewonderfulcountlessremarkable(
17、反义词：tinyordinarylowlyawfulslightlimited)替换替换人们PeopleHumanhumanbeingsmanmankindIndividualThepublicCitizen替换替换年轻人TheyoungTheyouthcynicalyouthTeenagersadolescentYoungadult替换替换老年人TheoldTheelderlySeniorcitizenTheadvancedTheaged替换替换员工StaffWorkersEmployeesclerks替换替换竞争对手CompetitorCompetitionCompetewithOppon
18、entRivalAdversarycontender替换替换特征特点CharacterCharacteristicsTraitFeatureAttributequality替换替换结果ResultConsequenceOutcomeaftermath替换替换缺少LackofShortShortageInsufficiency替换替换标准，基准StandardCriteriaCanonBenchmarkmilestone替换替换大量的AquantityofAlotoflotsofAlargenumberofPlentyofEnormoustremendousAnincreasingnumbero
19、fpeople替换替换可行的，可操作的OperationalUsableWorkableFeasiblePractical替换替换重要的SignificantSignificanceVitalEssentialCriticalCrucialofgreatimportanceKeydecisive替换替换产生，造成ProduceGenerateCreateTriggerEngenderpose替换替换解决；处理DealwithSolveCopewithResolveSettleTacklehandle替换替换支持，资助SupportSponsorBackupSubsidizesubsidyFin
20、ance替换替换转变ChangeTransformAlterShiftconvert替换替换强调，重视EmphasisemphasizeUnderlineHighlightDrawattentiontoTakesthseriously替换替换忽视，轻视IgnoreNeglectOverlookUnderestimateTakesthlightly名词大词名词大词Dilemma(problemcatch-22)StrategyCompromise:妥协；折中Paradox:矛盾Inequality:不平等Hierarch:等级classstatusDemocracy:民主动词大词动词大词Coll
21、aborate:协作Compensate:补偿Aggravate:恶化；加重Exaggerate:夸张形容词大词形容词大词Prosperous繁荣的Sustainabledevelopment可持续的Optimistic:乐观的pessimistic悲观的Potential:潜在的，可能的Inevitable:必然的；不可避免的连字符的合成词连字符的合成词Win-win双赢Cost-effective划算的Eco-friendly环保的Multi-cultural多元文化的Eye-catching引人注目的Market-oriented以市场为导向的Thought-provoking发人深省的
22、长短句范例长短句范例Pumasarelarge,cat-likeanimalswhicharefoundinAmerica.WhenreportscameintoLondonZoothatawildpumahadbeenspottedforty-fivemilessouthofLondon,theywerenottakenseriously.However,astheevidencebegantoaccumulate,expertsfromtheZoofeltobligedtoinvestigate,forthedescriptionsgivenbypeoplewhoclaimedtohave
23、seenthepumawereextraordinarilysimilar.长短句范例长短句范例Thehuntforthepumabeganinasmallvillagewhereawomanpickingblackberriessawalargecatonlyfiveyardsawayfromher.Itimmediatelyranawaywhenshesawit,andexpertsconfirmedthatapumawillnotattackahumanbeingunlessitiscornered.Thesearchproveddifficult,forthepumawasofteno
24、bservedatoneplaceinthemorningandatanotherplacetwentymilesawayintheevening.Whereveritwent,itleftbehinditatrailofdeaddeerandsmallanimalslikerabbits.长短句范例长短句范例Pawprintswereseeninanumberofplacesandpumafurwasfoundclingingtobushes.Severalpeoplecomplainedofcat-likenoisesatnightandabusinessmanonafishingtrip
25、sawthepumaupatree.Theexpertswerenowfullyconvincedthattheanimalwasapuma,butwherehaditcomefrom?Asnopumashadbeenreportedmissingfromanyzoointhecountry,thisonemusthavebeeninthepossessionofaprivatecollectorandsomehowmanagedtoescape.Thehuntwentonforseveralweeks,butthepumawasnotcaught.Itisdisturbingtothinkthatadangerouswildanimalisstillatlargeinthequietcountryside.-Newconcept3Lesson1Apumaatlarge推荐推荐NewConcept3（主讲写作）替换词查地方必应-字典听力普特英语Thank you for listening!BY group4 Calvin Yang