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1、Basic Writing 图表类作文 CommentsonaCommentsonacompositiononachartcompositiononachart 如今,随着年龄的增如今,随着年龄的增长,孩子与父母谈心长,孩子与父母谈心的时间越来越少。下的时间越来越少。下面的柱状图(面的柱状图(bar bar chartchart)显示了不同年)显示了不同年龄段孩子与父母谈心龄段孩子与父母谈心的情况。的情况。根据上图信息,请用根据上图信息,请用5 5句话写一篇有关句话写一篇有关“Heart-to-Heart Talks Heart-to-Heart Talks with Parentswith
2、Parents”的调查报道。要求如下:的调查报道。要求如下:1.1.描述图中信息;描述图中信息;2.2.说明原因(如忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题说明原因(如忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题););3.3.你的建议。你的建议。一、一、审题审题体裁体裁(内容)(内容)-时态时态 -人称人称-调查报告调查报告一般现在时这条主线(调查的一般现在时这条主线(调查的内容是孩子与父母谈心的情况)内容是孩子与父母谈心的情况)第三人称第三人称二、二、整合信息。整合信息。根据写作内容要求,合理划分所给信息点并组织成根据写作内容要求,合理划分所给信息点并组织成五个句子五个句子,确保内容完整性,逻辑性。确保内容完整性,逻
3、辑性。图表反映的总情况图表反映的总情况(随着年龄增长,孩子与父母谈随着年龄增长,孩子与父母谈心时间变少。)心时间变少。)分析图表数字的变化(分析数据间的主要差异分析图表数字的变化(分析数据间的主要差异与趋势)与趋势)归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题)缺少共同话题)个人建议个人建议A proper organization(三三)确定语言。确定语言。确定每句所用的确定每句所用的句型结构句型结构、语法语法及关键及关键词汇短语词汇短语,力求做到准确且使表达有特,力求做到准确且使表达有特色。色。1、图表反映的总情况图表反映的总情况(随着年
4、龄增长,孩子与随着年龄增长,孩子与父母谈心时间变少。)父母谈心时间变少。)随着孩子年龄的增长随着孩子年龄的增长花(时间)做某事花(时间)做某事 与与谈心谈心 .as children grow olderwith age increasingsb.spend time(in)doing sthsb.spare time to do sthIt takes sb.time to do sthtalk/communicate with sb.heart to hearthave heart-to-heart talks with sb.7-97-9岁的孩子岁的孩子2 2、分析图表数字的变化分析图表
5、数字的变化(7-9 7-9岁孩子与岁孩子与16-1816-18岁孩岁孩子的情况)子的情况)children(who are)from 7 to 9children(who are)aged from 7 to 9children(who are)between 7 and 9Children who range in age from 7 to 94 4、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题)缺少共同话题)忙于某事忙于某事be busy with/doing sthbe occupied with/doing sth7-9 age g
6、roups缺少共同话题缺少共同话题They seldom talk with each other for lack of common topics.There arent common topics for them to talk about.4 4、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题)缺少共同话题)5 5、个人建议个人建议为某事腾出时间为某事腾出时间set aside some time to do sth leave some time to do sth spare some time for sb./sth1 1、图表
7、反映的总情况图表反映的总情况(随着年龄增长,孩子与父母随着年龄增长,孩子与父母谈心时间变少。谈心时间变少。As time goes by,the time children spend talking with their parents heart to heart is less and less.With age increasing,children seldom have heart-to-heart talks with their parents.As they grow older,children spare less time to communicate with the
8、ir parents heart to heart.佳句推荐佳句推荐:2 2、分析图表数字的变化、分析图表数字的变化(7-97-9岁孩子与岁孩子与16-1816-18岁孩子的情况)岁孩子的情况)The time sb.spend doing sth.is hours.sb.talk with/communicate with sb.for hours sb.spend some time doing sth.The time children between 7 and 9 spend talking with their parents is 6 hours,which is twice l
9、onger than that spent by children from 16 to 18.Children between 7 and 9 talk with their parents for 6 hours per week on average while those from 16 to 18 spend only half the time.7-9 age groups spend 6 hours per week talking with their parents on average,while 16-18 age groups spend half the time.佳
10、句推荐佳句推荐:3 3、分析图表数字的变化分析图表数字的变化(10-12(10-12岁孩子与岁孩子与13-1513-15岁孩岁孩子的情况)子的情况)Compared with those aged between 13 and 15,children from10 to 12 spend one more hour(5 hours)talking with their parents.Children from 10 to 12 spend 5 hours on heart-to-heart talks with their parents,which is one hour more tha
11、n the time spent by those aged between 13 and 15.佳句推荐佳句推荐:主要有两个原因主要有两个原因:4 4、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、归纳并找出产生变化的原因(忙于学习或工作、缺少共同话题)缺少共同话题)There are two main reasons for this:表建议的句型:表建议的句型:5 5、个人建议个人建议It will be better if It will be a good idea.To deal with this,I strongly suggest佳句推荐佳句推荐:Two main reasons
12、 may account for this:5 5、个人建议个人建议 In order to have a better understanding of each other,we should spend more time talking with our parents however old we are.In my opinion,both parents and children should be aware of the importance of communication and set aside more time to talk with each other.In
13、 view of the situation,I think both parents and children should attach importance to it and spare no efforts to enhance mutual understanding.佳句推荐佳句推荐:(四)(四)连句成篇连句成篇:句与句之间根据逻辑使用适当的过渡词语或句与句之间根据逻辑使用适当的过渡词语或句型衔接成篇,力求连贯性。句型衔接成篇,力求连贯性。_ children spend less time having heart-to-heart talks with their paren
14、ts as they grow older._ the 7-9 age group spends as many as 6 hours per week on average,while the 16-18 age group spends only half the time._ the time the 10-12 age group spend is one hour more than that spent by the 13-15 age group._ both parents and children are too busy working or studying,and th
15、ere arent many common topics for them to talk about._ children should let their parents know more about what they are interested in and parents should spend more time talking with their children and sharing opinions with them.In my opinion,There are two main reasons for this:Moreover,As is shown in
16、the bar chart,A recent survey shows that(五)(五)Evaluation Pay attention to:Content Language(Tense 时态时态,Phrases搭配搭配,sentence structure,grammar)Coherence(连贯性连贯性)给作文评分(习作一)给作文评分(习作二)给作文评分(习作三)学生习作一学生习作一With the time went by,students seldom talk with parents heart to heart.It can be seen from the result
17、that students who between 7 age to 9 age are usually use 6 hours to talk with parents,while the age of 10 to 15 are oftent use during four to five hours.Whats worse,only 3 hours a week do students who 16 age to 18 age to talk with parents.The reason why cause this situation is that parents are too b
18、usy and students think they have generaption gap with their parents.In my opion,students should spent more time to talk with parents heart to heart.As time goes by,who are between 7 and 9usually sparewhile those aged from 10 to 15 spend are spent by children from 16 to 18 talking for busy and studen
19、ts think there is a generation gap between them and their parents.opinion,spend more time talking语言语言要点要点连贯连贯得分得分学学生生习习作作一一基本上能使用简单的词汇和句型表达出本题要求的内基本上能使用简单的词汇和句型表达出本题要求的内容。习作中的基本每句语法上都出现错误,如容。习作中的基本每句语法上都出现错误,如:“students who between 7 age to 9 agestudents who between 7 age to 9 age”,:“spend time to d
20、o sthspend time to do sth”,这是许多学生常犯的错误,这是许多学生常犯的错误,第四句为直译,比较呆板。第四句为直译,比较呆板。要点齐全,但是对柱形图不会采用分类式或对比式的要点齐全,但是对柱形图不会采用分类式或对比式的描写。描写。使用了使用了“It can be seen from the result that,It can be seen from the result that,whatwhats worse,In my opinions worse,In my opinion”等连接词,基本符等连接词,基本符合连贯性的要求。合连贯性的要求。8 8分分老师评语老师
21、评语学生习作二学生习作二 Its clear from the chart that children from 10 to 15 years old spend about 4.5 hours talking with parents heart to heart per week.To our delight,it takes some children who are 7 to 9 years old 6 hours to talk with parents per week.Whats worse,the teenagers from 16 to 18 years old only t
22、alk to parents for 3 hours every week.Because of the studying and work in a hurry,they have not enough time to communicate with each other and they are lack of the same topic and so on.As far as Im concerned,talking with parents heart to heart is necessary for our growth.busy study or worktopicsfor
23、them to talk about.there arent common 语言语言要点要点连贯连贯得分得分学学生生习习作作二二语言方面基本没有错误,但是表达还是不够准语言方面基本没有错误,但是表达还是不够准确,如第四句中确,如第四句中“Because of the studying Because of the studying and work in a hurry,they have not and work in a hurry,they have not enough time to communicate with each enough time to communicate w
24、ith each other and they are lack of the same other and they are lack of the same topic and so on.topic and so on.”.而且没有描述表格的而且没有描述表格的总情况。总情况。要点基本齐全,句子数量符合要求。要点基本齐全,句子数量符合要求。使用了使用了ItIts clear from the chart thats clear from the chart that,to our to our delight,Whatdelight,Whats worse,because of,As fa
25、r as s worse,because of,As far as I Im concernedm concerned等词语,连贯性不错。等词语,连贯性不错。1010分分老师评语老师评语学生习作三学生习作三 Nowadays,children spend less time in having heart-to-heart talks with their dear parents with the growth of age.As the bar chart shows,children between 7 and 9 spend 6 hours talking with their par
26、ents every week and kids between 10 and 12 rank the second.However,children aged 13 to 15 have a word with their parents for only 4 hours every week for the reason that their parents are busy in work.What disappoints me most is that children between 16 and 18 communicate with their parents for only
27、3 hours each week for they need to finish much homework or they find it difficult to talk with their elderly parents.When it comes to my opinion,I strongly suggest that children and parents should spend more time with each other,which is of great importance to promote their relationship.aged from 13
28、 to 15语言语言要点要点连贯连贯得分得分学学生生习习作作三三第一句使用了第一句使用了“Nowadays,children spend less time”直接点出了图表反映的总情况,在表达直接点出了图表反映的总情况,在表达“花多长时间花多长时间进行交流进行交流”使用了多种形式的句型:使用了多种形式的句型:sb.spend time doing sth;sb.rank the second;sb.have a word with sb.for hours;communicate with sb.forhours.本文最本文最大的亮点就是使用了较多有特色的表达:大的亮点就是使用了较多有特色的表
29、达:What disappoints me most句型;句型;find it+adj.+to do sth.结结构;尤其是最后一句,使用了构;尤其是最后一句,使用了When it comes to.;I strongly suggest that 句型;句型;be of+great+n.结构;结构;which引导的定语从句,使文章提高了一个档次。引导的定语从句,使文章提高了一个档次。要点齐全,句子数量符合要求。要点齐全,句子数量符合要求。使用了使用了As can be seen from the bar chart,however,What disappoints me most,When
30、it comes to等词等词语,连贯性很好。语,连贯性很好。13分分老师评语老师评语Heart-to-Heart Talks with Parents As is shown in the bar chart,children spend less time having heart-to-heart talks with their parents as they grow older.For example,while the 7-9 age groups spend as many as 6 hours per week on average,the 16-18 age groups
31、spend only half the time.Moreover,the time the 10-12 age groups spend is one hour more than that spent by the 13-15 age group.There are two major reasons for this:both parents and children are too busy working or studying,and there arent many topics of common interest for them to talk about.In my op
32、inion,children should let their parents know more about what they are interested in and at the same time,parents should spend more time talking with their children and sharing opinions with them.Possible versionHeart-to-HeartTalkswithParentsNowadays,childrenspendlesstimehavingheart-to-hearttalkswith
33、theirparentsastheygrowolder.Therearetwomajorreasonsaccountingforthis.Firstofall,parentsaretoobusyworkingandchildrenareoccupiedwiththeirstudying,sotheycantsparemuchtimetotalkwitheachother.Secondly,therearentmanytopicsofcommoninterestforparentsandchildrentotalkabout.Besides,childrencanthavetheirparent
34、sastheirownfriendsbecauseofthegenerationgapbetweenthem.Asforme,Icommunicatewithmyparentsforatleast1houreveryday,tellingthemwhathappensinmyclassandwhatIamworriedabouttogettimelyhelpandcomfortfromthem.Inmyopinion,childrenshouldlettheirparentsknowmoreaboutwhattheyareinterestedin.Atthesametime,parentssh
35、ouldspendmoretimetalkingwiththeirchildrenandsharingopinionswiththem.Onlyinthiswaycantheybetterunderstandeachother.HomeworkHomeworkFinish the task writing.以“Heart-to-HeartTalkswithParents”为题,用120个词说明此问题的原因并谈谈你的做法和建议。(1)说明孩子与父母谈心时间越来越少的原因;(2)谈谈你与父母是如何沟通的;(3)针对这种情况,你有什么建议。广东梅县东山中学英语组 侯斯娜Thank you!Goodbye