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1、TwilightStephenie Meyer2005PrefaceId never given much thought to how I would die though Id had reason enough inthe last few months but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.I stared without breathing across the long room, into the dark eyes of the hunter, and helooked pleasantly back
2、 at me.Surely it was a good way to die, in the place of someone else, someone I loved. Noble,even. That ought to count for something.I knew that if Id never gone to Forks, I wouldnt be facing death now. But, terrified as Iwas, I couldnt bring myself to regret the decision. When life offers you a dre
3、am so farbeyond any of your expectations, its not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.The hunter smiled in a friendly way as he sauntered forward to kill me.1. First SightMy mother drove me to the airport with the windows rolled down. It was seventy-fivedegrees in Phoenix, the sky a perfect
4、, cloudless blue. I was wearing my favorite shirt sleeveless, white eyelet lace; I was wearing it as a farewell gesture. My carry-on item wasa parka.In the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington State, a small town named Forksexists under a near-constant cover of clouds. It rains on this inconseq
5、uential town morethan any other place in the United States of America. It was from this town and itsgloomy, omnipresent shade that my mother escaped with me when I was only a fewmonths old. It was in this town that Id been compelled to spend a month every summeruntil I was fourteen. That was the yea
6、r I finally put my foot down; these past threesummers, my dad, Charlie, vacationed with me in California for two weeks instead.It was to Forks that I now exiled myself an action that I took with great horror. Idetested Forks.I loved Phoenix. I loved the sun and the blistering heat. I loved the vigor
7、ous, sprawlingcity.Bella, my mom said to me the last of a thousand times before I got on theplane. You dont have to do this.My mom looks like me, except with short hair and laugh lines. I felt a spasm of panicas I stared at her wide, childlike eyes. How could I leave my loving, erratic, harebrainedm
8、other to fend for herself ? Of course she had Phil now, so the bills would probably getpaid, there would be food in the refrigerator, gas in her car, and someone to call when shegot lost, but stillI want to go, I lied. Id always been a bad liar, but Id been saying this lie sofrequently lately that i
9、t sounded almost convincing now.Tell Charlie I said hi.I will.Ill see you soon, she insisted. You can come home whenever you want Ill comeright back as soon as you need me.But I could see the sacrifice in her eyes behind the promise.Dont worry about me, I urged. Itll be great. I love you, Mom.She hu
10、gged me tightly for a minute, and then I got on the plane, and she was gone.Its a four-hour flight from Phoenix to Seattle, another hour in a small plane up to PortAngeles, and then an hour drive back down to Forks. Flying doesnt bother me; the hourin the car with Charlie, though, I was a little wor
11、ried about.Charlie had really been fairly nice about the whole thing. He seemed genuinely pleasedthat I was coming to live with him for the first time with any degree of permanence. Hedalready gotten me registered for high school and was going to help me get a car.But it was sure to be awkward with
12、Charlie. Neither of us was what anyone would callverbose, and I didnt know what there was to say regardless. I knew he was more than alittle confused by my decision like my mother before me, I hadnt made a secret of mydistaste for Forks.When I landed in Port Angeles, it was raining. I didnt see it a
13、s an omen justunavoidable. Id already said my goodbyes to the sun.Charlie was waiting for me with the cruiser. This I was expecting, too. Charlie is PoliceChief Swan to the good people of Forks. My primary motivation behind buying a car,despite the scarcity of my funds, was that I refused to be driv
14、en around town in a car withred and blue lights on top. Nothing slows down traffic like a cop.Charlie gave me an awkward, one-armed hug when I stumbled my way off the plane.Its good to see you, Bells, he said, smiling as he automatically caught and steadiedme. You havent changed much. Hows Rene?Moms
15、 fine. Its good to see you, too, Dad. I wasnt allowed to call him Charlie to hisface.I had only a few bags. Most of my Arizona clothes were too permeable for Washington.My mom and I had pooled our resources to supplement my winter wardrobe, but it wasstill scanty. It all fit easily into the trunk of
16、 the cruiser.I found a good car for you, really cheap, he announced when we were strapped in.What kind of car? I was suspicious of the way he said good car for you as opposedto just good car.Well, its a truck actually, a Chevy.Where did you find it?Do you remember Billy Black down at La Push? La Pus
17、h is the tiny Indianreservation on the coast.No.He used to go fishing with us during the summer, Charlie prompted.That would explain why I didnt remember him. I do a good job of blocking painful,unnecessary things from my memory.Hes in a wheelchair now, Charlie continued when I didnt respond, so he
18、cant driveanymore, and he offered to sell me his truck cheap.What year is it? I could see from his change of expression that this was the questionhe was hoping I wouldnt ask.Well, Billys done a lot of work on the engine its only a few years old, really.I hoped he didnt think so little of me as to be
19、lieve I would give up that easily. Whendid he buy it?He bought it in 1984, I think.Did he buy it new?Well, no. I think it was new in the early sixties or late fifties at the earliest, headmitted sheepishly.Ch Dad, I dont really know anything about cars. I wouldnt be able to fix it ifanything went wr
20、ong, and I couldnt afford a mechanicReally, Bella, the thing runs great. They dont build them like that anymore.The thing, I thought to myself it had possibilities as a nickname, at the very least.How cheap is cheap? After all, that was the part I couldnt compromise on.Well, honey, I kind of already
21、 bought it for you. As a homecoming gift. Charliepeeked sideways at me with a hopeful expression.Wow. Free.You didnt need to do that, Dad. I was going to buy myself a car.I dont mind. I want you to be happy here. He was looking ahead at the road when hesaid this. Charlie wasnt comfortable with expre
22、ssing his emotions out loud. I inheritedthat from him. So I was looking straight ahead as I responded.Thats really nice, Dad. Thanks. I really appreciate it. No need to add that my beinghappy in Forks is an impossibility. He didnt need to suffer along with me. And I neverlooked a free truck in the m
23、outh or engine.Well, now, youre welcome, he mumbled, embarrassed by my thanks.We exchanged a few more comments on the weather, which was wet, and that waspretty much it for Conversation. We stared out the windows in silence.It was beautiful, of course; I couldnt deny that. Everything was green: the
24、trees, theirtrunks covered with moss, their branches hanging with a canopy of it, the ground coveredwith ferns. Even the air filtered down greenly through the leaves.It was too green an alien planet.Eventually we made it to Charlies. He still lived in the small, two-bedroom house thathed bought with
25、 my mother in the early days of their marriage. Those were the only kindof days their marriage had the early ones. There, parked on the street in front of thehouse that never changed, was my new well, new to me truck. It was a faded redcolor, with big, rounded fenders and a bulbous cab. To my intens
26、e surprise, I loved it. Ididnt know if it would run, but I could see myself in it. Plus, it was one of those solidiron affairs that never gets damaged the kind you see at the scene of an accident, paintunscratched, surrounded by the pieces of the foreign car it had destroyed.Wow, Dad, I love it! Tha
27、nks! Now my horrific day tomorrow would be just that muchless dreadful. I wouldnt be faced with the choice of either walking two miles in the rainto school or accepting a ride in the Chiefs cruiser.Im glad you like it, Charlie said gruffly, embarrassed again.It took only one trip to get all my stuff
28、 upstairs. I got the west bedroom that faced outover the front yard. The room was familiar; it had been belonged to me since I was born.The wooden floor, the light blue walls, the peaked ceiling, the yellowed lace curtainsaround the window these were all a part of my childhood. The only changes Char
29、liehad ever made were switching the crib for a bed and adding a desk as I grew. The desknow held a secondhand computer, with the phone line for the modem stapled along thefloor to the nearest phone jack. This was a stipulation from my mother, so that we couldstay in touch easily. The rocking chair f
30、rom my baby days was still in the corner.There was only one small bathroom at the top of the stairs, which I would have to sharewith Charlie. I was trying not to dwell too much on that fact.One of the best things about Charlie is he doesnt hover. He left me alone to unpack andget settled, a feat tha
31、t would have been altogether impossible for my mother. It was niceto be alone, not to have to smile and look pleased; a relief to stare dejectedly out thewindow at the sheeting rain and let just a few tears escape. I wasnt in the mood to go ona real crying jag. I would save that for bedtime, when I
32、would have to think about thecoming morning.Forks High School had a frightening total of only three hundred and fifty-seven nowfifty-eight students; there were more than seven hundred people in my junior classalone back home. All of the kids here had grown up together their grandparents hadbeen todd
33、lers together.I would be the new girl from the big city, a curiosity, a freak.Maybe, if I looked like a girl from Phoenix should, I could work this to my advantage.But physically, Id never fit in anywhere. I should be tan, sporty, blond a volleyballplayer, or a cheerleader, perhaps all the things th
34、at go with living in the valley of thesun.Instead, I was ivory-skinned, without even the excuse of blue eyes or red hair, despitethe constant sunshine. I had always been slender, but soft somehow, obviously not anathlete; I didnt have the necessary hand-eye coordination to play sports withouthumilia
35、ting myself and harming both myself and anyone else who stood too close.When I finished putting my clothes in the old pine dresser, I took my bag of bathroomnecessities and went to the communal bathroom to clean myself up after the day of travel.I looked at my face in the mirror as I brushed through
36、 my tangled, damp hair. Maybe itwas the light, but already I looked sallower, unhealthy. My skin could be pretty it wasvery clear, almost translucent-looking but it all depended on color. I had no color here.Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forced to admit that I was lying tomyself.
37、It wasnt just physically that Id never fit in. And if I couldnt find a niche in aschool with three thousand people, what were my chances here?I didnt relate well to people my age. Maybe the truth was that I didnt relate well topeople, period. Even my mother, who I was closer to than anyone else on t
38、he planet, wasnever in harmony with me, never on exactly the same page. Sometimes I wondered if Iwas seeing the same things through my eyes that the rest of the world was seeing throughtheirs. Maybe there was a glitch in my brain. But the cause didnt matter. All that matteredwas the effect. And tomo
39、rrow would be just the beginning.I didnt sleep well that night, even after I was done crying. The constant whooshing ofthe rain and wind across the roof wouldnt fade into the background. I pulled the fadedold quilt over my head, and later added the pillow, too. But I couldnt fall asleep untilafter m
40、idnight, when the rain finally settled into a quieter drizzle.Thick fog was all I could see out my window in the morning, and I could feel theclaustrophobia creeping up on me. You could never see the sky here; it was like a cage.Breakfast with Charlie was a quiet event. He wished me good luck at sch
41、ool. I thankedhim, knowing his hope was wasted. Good luck tended to avoid me. Charlie left first, offto the police station that was his wife and family. After he left, I sat at the old square oaktable in one of the three unmatching chairs and examined his small kitchen, with its darkpaneled walls, b
42、right yellow cabinets, and white linoleum floor. Nothing was changed.My mother had painted the cabinets eighteen years ago in an attempt to bring somesunshine into the house. Over the small fireplace in the adjoining handkerchief-sizedfamily room was a row of pictures. First a wedding picture of Cha
43、rlie and my mom inLas Vegas, then one of the three of us in the hospital after I was born, taken by a helpfulnurse, followed by the procession of my school pictures up to last years. Those wereembarrassing to look at I would have to see what I could do to get Charlie to put themsomewhere else, at le
44、ast while I was living here.It was impossible, being in this house, not to realize that Charlie had never gotten overmy mom. It made me uncomfortable.I didnt want to be too early to school, but I couldnt stay in the house anymore. Idonned my jacket which had the feel of a biohazard suit and headed o
45、ut into therain.It was just drizzling still, not enough to soak me through immediately as I reached forthe house key that was always hidden under the eaves by the door, and locked up. Thesloshing of my new waterproof boots was unnerving. I missed the normal crunch ofgravel as I walked. I couldnt pau
46、se and admire my truck again as I wanted; I was in ahurry to get out of the misty wet that swirled around my head and clung to my hair undermy hood.Inside the truck, it was nice and dry. Either Billy or Charlie had obviously cleaned it up,but the tan upholstered seats still smelled faintly of tobacc
47、o, gasoline, and peppermint.The engine started quickly, to my relief, but loudly, roaring to life and then idling at topvolume. Well, a truck this old was bound to have a flaw. The antique radio worked, a plusthat I hadnt expected.Finding the school wasnt difficult, though Id never been there before. The school was,like most other things, just off the highway. It was not obvious that it was a school; onlythe sign, which declared it to be the Forks High School, made me stop. It looked like acollection of matching houses, built with maroon-colored bricks. There were