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1、Show,dont tellShow,dont tell读后续写之动作和情绪描写新高考英语一轮复习新高考英语一轮复习本课目标u1.复习读后续写”三原则四步骤”u2.能够理解并使用固定句式进行动作描写和情绪描写u3.能够根据短文细节,合理选用动作描写和情绪描写撰写与原文相呼应的细节,提升续文合理度,与原文融洽度及语言优美度.读 后 续 写 高 考 真 题 题 号问题原 因办 法体裁主题思想2021新高考双胞胎做早餐把厨房弄得一团糟给母亲惊喜,庆祝母亲节 their father appeared父亲助攻记叙文母亲节惊喜2020新高考Bernard如何赚钱帮助养家经济衰退John had an i
2、dea:做爆米花卖钱记叙文助人献爱心2020.07 浙江野熊来到营地前熊闻到面包大蒜气味tried known actions:.辣椒水直升飞机记叙文险境求生2020.01 浙江小宠物狗郁郁寡欢小主人上大学Mum had an idea:给它买个狗伴记叙文让宠物狗高兴起来2018.06 浙江农场游玩迷路小兔惊马？记叙文迷途脱困2017.06 浙江骑行遇狼未知向路过轿车求助记叙文险境求生快速完成优质续写文的策略探索续写规律:01原文一致原则原文一致原则内容要内容要前后衔接前后衔接，上下连贯上下连贯语言表达语言表达风格一致风格一致。03曲折性原则曲折性原则故事故事情节情节应应跌宕跌宕起伏起伏，其中
3、人物会遇到困难或其中人物会遇到困难或问题，但问题，但最最终能解决终能解决。02正能量原则正能量原则故事内容一定要故事内容一定要正能量正能量，弘扬社会主义，弘扬社会主义核心价值观。如迷路了但最终一定核心价值观。如迷路了但最终一定回到了家；失败了或遇到困难了，但回到了家；失败了或遇到困难了，但最终一定成功了；吵架了但最后一定最终一定成功了；吵架了但最后一定是言归于好是言归于好,和睦相处和睦相处；犯错了，最后一定会改过自新，重新做人；贼逃了，最后一定犯错了，最后一定会改过自新，重新做人；贼逃了，最后一定是绳之以法是绳之以法等等。等等。三原则四个步骤四个步骤2.2.2.2.细读首句，构思框架细读首句，
4、构思框架仔仔细细阅阅读读所所给给两两段段的的首首句句，结结合合正正能能量量结结尾尾，思考思考大致框架大致框架。1.1.1.1.读懂大意，理清脉络读懂大意，理清脉络读所给的不完整故事，弄读所给的不完整故事，弄清大意和主题，理清故事清大意和主题，理清故事的的主要人物和事件主要人物和事件。4.4.4.4.修改润色，整洁誊写修改润色，整洁誊写思考再三，把思考再三，把修正润色修正润色后后的续写整洁地写入答卷。的续写整洁地写入答卷。3.3.3.3.增加细节，开始写作增加细节，开始写作依据情节发展和常识，在确依据情节发展和常识，在确定的框架内，可按定的框架内，可按“所见所见/遇所想，所为所感遇所想，所为所感
5、”等构思等构思具体细节。具体细节。Characters:Who,Events:What(when,where,how,why)环境描写,语言描写,动作描写,情绪描写,心理描写,检查错误升级句式注意三个衔接How to make your continuation writing vivid?题材题材Show,dont tellShow,dont tell动作链:一连串的动作构成画面使用一连串动作让画面动起来妙招一:动作描写 动作链题材题材例例1:Fortunately,hethrewmeabranchandpulledmeout.Helayonhisstomach,pushedthebranc
6、hbeforehimandwoundhiswaytowardsme.Igrabbledthebranchwithcareandwasultimatelydraggedoutoftheicewater.动作1动作2并列的主要动作-全用谓语动词表示（动词时态要一致）动作3动作4动作5妈妈抱住孩子妈妈抱住孩子.形成动作链:冲向前蹲下来一把抱住She dashed forward,knelt down and gathered me into her arms.描述一系列的动作。如果是同一个主语做了两个动作以上，可以用这样的结构：主+谓1,谓2 and(then)谓3，这可以进行大量的动作细节描写，完
7、整的交代过程。She hugged me tightly./She gave me a hug.1.他把肉扔向狼.2.他上台领奖并发言.He took out the meat,aimed at the wolf and threw it straight to the fierce animal.Practice:He glanced at the trophy/cup,took a deep breath and said,“Thank my opponent”.妙招一:动作描写 动作链 题材题材例例2:Theyoungmanfailedthesecondroundandwassoneve
8、rousthathewasatalosswhattodo.Having failed thesecondround,theyoungmanwassoneverousthathewasatalosswhattodo.主语动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动且先发生用having done）Skill2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，非谓语(主动且完成:Having done sth),主+谓 主语动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动且先发生,用having done）3.排了三个小时的队伍,他被告知票
9、被卖完了.Practice:非谓语(主动且完成:Having done sth),主+谓Havingqueuedfor3hours,hewastoldthattheticketshadbeensoldout.Blamedbyhisteacherandlaughedatbyeveryone,he feltratherupsetanddepressed.主语动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（被动形式done）3.受到老师的责难和大家的嘲笑，他感到相当的不安和沮丧。动作3Practice:Skill2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，使用非谓语(d
10、one 被动),主+谓Thegirlbeganblowingherwhistle,tryingtogetothersattention。主语动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动用doing）4.女孩开始吹她的口哨，尝试去吸引其他人的注意力。Practice:Skill2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，可用:主+谓,非谓语(主动用doing)How to make your continuation writing vivid?题材题材动作链:一连串的动作构成画面Skill1:描述一系列的动作。如果是同一个主语做了两个动作以上，可用:主+谓
11、1,谓2 and(then)谓3，Skill2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，可用:1.非谓语,主+谓2.主+谓,非谓语非谓语:主动且完成:Having done sth 主动:doing 被动done仿写练习1-主+谓1.,谓2.,and 谓3.在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容点击此处添加标题在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容点击此处添加标题1.女孩停止了啜泣(sob)，从女人身边退了(step)回来，开始唱歌。_2.她
12、登上(board)飞机，坐在座位上，寻找她的书。_3.那个女人从他手里抓起最后一块饼干，怒视(glareat)着他._The girlstopped sobbing,stepped backfromthewomanand began tosing.Sheboarded theplane,sat onherseatand thenlooked forherbook.The womangrabbed thelastbiscuitfromhishandand thenglared athim.仿写练习2-doing/done.(分词作状语),主语+谓语在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处
13、添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容点击此处添加标题在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容在此处添加内容点击此处添加标题练习：1.听了这话，凯瑟琳跑得飞快。_2.当我和妈妈一起装饰(decorate)房子时，我不小心摔坏了一个昂贵的花瓶(vase)。_3.意识到我负担(afford)不起继续深造的事实，我不得不停止追逐(chase)我的梦想。_4.在知道我的英语很好之后，他给了我一份打字的(typ
14、e)工作，答应(promise)教我计算机，并提供住宿(accommodation)。_Hearing this,Cathrine ran asfastasherlegcouldcarryher.Whendecorating thehousewithmymother,Iaccidentallybroke anexpensivevase.Realizing thatIcantaffordtocontinuemyfurtherstudy,Ihad tostopchasingmydream.Afterknowing thatmyEnglishwasverygood,he gave meatyping
15、job,promised toteachmecomputerandprovided accommodation.How to make your continuation writing vivid?题材题材Show,dont tellShow,dont tell喜怒形于色感受情绪:喜怒形于色-He is happy.His smile broadened His smile broadened from ear to from ear to ear.ear.He He clapped his hands clapped his hands together and together and
16、jumped up and down jumped up and down with joy.with joy.He He giggledgiggled and and squealedsquealed with with excitement.excitement.facebodyvoiceSkill 1:Skill 1:从从 面部面部/肢体和声音肢体和声音 三个方面体现人物的喜怒哀乐三个方面体现人物的喜怒哀乐.v.咯咯地笑v.长声尖叫感受情绪:喜怒形于色-She is angry.Her Her cheeks/eyes cheeks/eyes turned red and her turn
17、ed red and her eyebrowseyebrows narrowed/narrowed/mouthmouth pouted.pouted.She raised her She raised her clenched fistsclenched fists.She clenched her fists and She clenched her fists and put them on put them on her hipsher hips.She began to She began to growl atgrowl at me through me through clench
18、ed teethclenched teeth.紧握双拳双手叉腰向咆哮感受情绪:套用固定句式例2:1.She felt a great sense of anger welling up in her heart and surging through her.她感到一股强烈的怒意在内心升腾/奔涌.2.Judging from her voice,it was evident that she was trapped in great concern/worry.从她的声音判断,很明显她陷入了极大的忧虑之中.Sb情绪sbssbsbssb情绪固定句式再升级情绪+结果:感到一股强烈的愤怒在内心升腾奔
19、涌,妈妈严厉地批评了Harry.外界刺激+情绪:看着冷的发抖的我,妈妈感到一股强烈的震惊在内心升腾奔涌.Feeling Feeling a great sense of anger welling up in her heart and surging through her,mom criticized Harry strictly/harshly.动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动形式doing）Looking at me shivering with coldness,mom felt Looking at me shivering with c
20、oldness,mom felt a great sense of shock welling up in her heart and surging through her.动作1动作2主要动作-用谓语动词表示（时态）次要动作-用非谓语动词表示（主动形式doing）感受情绪:套用固定句式Skill 2:套用固定句式1.sb.felt a great sense of+情绪名词+welling up in sbs heart and surging through sb.“某人感到一股强烈的在内心升腾,奔涌”(情绪内隐)2.Judging from sbs voice/eyes/express
21、ion/behavior,it was evident that sb was trapped in+情绪名词.(情绪外露)从某人的声音/眼神/表情/行为判断,很明显他陷入了状态之中.点拨点拨:由于增加了情节由于增加了情节,必然会增加动词必然会增加动词,在不增加连词的情况下在不增加连词的情况下,需要把部分需要把部分动词变成非谓语动词变成非谓语;在在“情绪情绪+结果结果”结构中结构中,一般一般“情绪情绪”使用非谓语使用非谓语,“结果结果”使用谓语使用谓语;而在而在“外界刺激外界刺激+情绪情绪”结构中结构中,一般一般“外界刺激外界刺激”使用非谓语使用非谓语,“情绪情绪”使用谓语使用谓语.前加”诱因
22、”后加”结果”How to make your continuation writing vivid?题材题材喜怒形于色Skill 1:从从 面部面部/肢体和声音肢体和声音 三个方面体现人物的喜怒哀乐三个方面体现人物的喜怒哀乐.Skill 2:套用固定句式1.sb.felt a great sense of+情绪名词+welling up in sbs heart and surging through sb.“某人感到一股强烈的在内心升腾,奔涌”(情绪内隐)2.Judging from sbs voice/eyes/expression/behavior,it was evident tha
23、t sb was trapped in+情绪名词.(情绪外露)从某人的声音/眼神/表情/行为判断,很明显他陷入了前加”诱因”后加”结果”结合技巧1题材题材Show,dont tellShow,dont tellSkill1:主语一致的主要动作2:主+谓1,谓2 and(then)谓3，Skill 1:从从 面部面部/肢体和声音肢体和声音 三个方面体现人三个方面体现人物的喜怒哀乐物的喜怒哀乐.Skill 2:套用固定句式1.sb.felt a great sense of+情绪名词+welling up in sbs heart and surging through sb.2.Judging
24、from sbs voice/eyes/expression/behavior,it was evident that sb was trapped in+情绪名词.(情绪外露)SummarySummary 积累丰富的动词积累丰富的动词积累情绪相关名词积累情绪相关名词grief.n.悲痛,忧伤sorrow,n,难过 悲伤sadness n.悲哀misery n.痛苦anguish n.苦闷,痛苦disappointment n.失望despair n.绝望contentment n.满足rapture n.狂喜glee n.欢乐,高兴felicity n.幸福ecstasy n.狂喜,入迷Sk
25、ill2:当出现两个动作，而前后两个动作逻辑主语一致时，可用:1.非谓语,主+谓2.主+谓,非谓语非谓语:主动且完成:Having done sth 主动:doing 被动done以“说”为例:chat vi.&n.聊天；闲聊whisper v.小声说；耳语speak v.说；演讲；发言inform vt.通知；告知announce vt.宣告declare vt.宣布；声明claim vt.声称；要求roar vt.咆哮sigh v.叹气murmur v.低声说2021202120212021新高考新高考新高考新高考卷卷卷卷:阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，阅读下面材料，根
26、据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为150150150150左右。左右。左右。左右。A MOTHERS DAY SURPRISE The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mothers Day.How p
27、leased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed.They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge.They had watched their mother in the kitchen.There was nothing to it.Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.The big day came at last.The alarm rang at 6 a.m.The pair went do
28、wn the stairs quietly to the kitchen.They decided to boil the porridge first.They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast.Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture.Next,Jeff tur
29、ned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan.Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds.Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread.This time,she turned down the fire so
30、 it cooked nicely.ThenJeffnoticedsteamshootingoutofthepotandthelidstartingtoshake.Thenextminute,theporridgeboiledoverandputoutthefire.Jennapanicked.Thankfully,Jeffstayedcalmandturnedoffthegasquickly.Butthestovewasamessnow.JennatoldJefftocleanitupsotheycouldcontinuetocooktherestoftheporridge.ButJeffs
31、handtouchedthehotburnerandhegaveacryofpain.Jennamadehimputhishandincoldwater.Thenshecaughtthesmellofburning.Ohdear!Thepieceofbreadinthepanhadturnedblackaswell.注意：1.续写词数应为150左右；2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。Para1:Asthetwinslookedaroundthemindisappointment,theirfatherappeared.Para2:Thetwinscarriedthebreakfastup
32、stairsandwoketheirmotherup.(1)(1)(1)(1)读懂大意读懂大意读懂大意读懂大意,理清脉络理清脉络理清脉络理清脉络(2)(2)(2)(2)细读首句细读首句细读首句细读首句,构思框架构思框架构思框架构思框架(3)(3)增加细节增加细节增加细节增加细节,开始写作开始写作开始写作开始写作(4)(4)(4)(4)修改润色，整洁誊写修改润色，整洁誊写修改润色，整洁誊写修改润色，整洁誊写A MOTHERS DAY SURPRISEA MOTHERS DAY SURPRISE The The twins twins were were filled filled with wi
33、th excitement excitement as as they they thought thought of of the the surprise surprise they they were were planning planning for for Mothers Mothers Day.Day.How How pleased pleased and and proud proud Mother Mother would would be be when when they they brought brought her her breakfast breakfast i
34、n in bed.bed.They They planned planned to to make make French French toast toast and and chicken chicken porridge.porridge.They They had had watched watched their their mother mother in in the the kitchen.kitchen.There There was was nothing nothing to to it.it.Jenna Jenna and and Jeff Jeff knew exac
35、tly what to do.knew exactly what to do.一对双胞胎计划一对双胞胎计划给母亲做早餐作给母亲做早餐作为母亲节的惊喜为母亲节的惊喜,The big day came at last.The alarm rang at 6 a.m.The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen.They decided to boil the porridge first.They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made t
36、he French toast.Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture.Next,Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan.Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.The pan was too hot and the br
37、ead turned black within seconds.Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread.This time,she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.计划按部就班地进行着计划按部就班地进行着 Then Then Jeff Jeff noticed noticed steam steam shooting shooting out out of of the the pot pot and and the the li
38、d lid starting starting to to shake.shake.The The next next minute,minute,the the porridge porridge boiled boiled over over and and put put out out the the fire.fire.Jenna Jenna panicked.panicked.ThankfullyThankfully,Jeff Jeff stayed stayed calm calm and and turned turned off off the the gas gas qui
39、ckly.quickly.ButBut the the stove stove was was a a mess mess now.now.Jenna Jenna told told Jeff Jeff to to clean clean it it up up so so they they could could continue continue to to cook cook the the rest rest of of the the porridge.porridge.But But Jeffs Jeffs hand hand touched touched the the ho
40、t hot burner burner and and he he gave gave a a cry cry of of pain.pain.Jenna Jenna made made him him put put his his hand hand in in cold cold water.water.Then Then she she caught caught the the smell smell of of burning.burning.Oh Oh dear!dear!The The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as
41、wellpiece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.续写续写:Para1:Para1:As As the the twins twins looked looked around around them them in in disappointment,disappointment,their father appeared.their father appeared.Para2:Para2:The The twins twins carried carried the the breakfast breakfast upstairs
42、 upstairs and and woke woke their mother up.their mother up.负能量正能量反转在在父亲父亲的助攻下的助攻下,早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜!段首句决定故事走向不随意添加新人物段首句决定故事走向负能量-转-正能量(1)(1)读懂大意读懂大意,理清脉络理清脉络(2)(2)细读首句细读首句,构思框架构思框架(3)(3)增加细节增加细节,开始写作开始写作原文中找可呼应的细节原文细节原文细节1:1:The The next next minute,minute,the the porridge porridge boiled
43、 boiled over over and and put put out out the the fire.fire.But But the the stove stove was was a a mess mess now.now.Jeffs Jeffs hand hand touched touched the the hot hot burner burner and and he he gave gave a a cry cry of of pain.pain.Oh Oh dear!dear!The The piece piece of of bread bread in in th
44、e the pan pan had had turned turned black as wellblack as well.父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后,没有发火没有发火没有发火没有发火父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐 在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下,早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了他们都非常开心和自豪他们都非常开心和自豪他们都非常开心和自豪他们都非常开心和自豪 母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜!注意三衔接:th
45、eir father appeared.Para2:carried the breakfast upstairs woke their mother up.衔接一衔接二所给短文的最后一段Module 1 Module 1 读后续写读后续写-增加细节增加细节原文细节原文细节2:2:The The twins twins were were filled filled with with excitement excitement as as they they thought thought of of the the surprise surprise they they were were
46、planning planning for for Mothers Mothers Day.Day.How How pleased pleased and and proud proud Mother Mother would would be be when when they they brought brought her her breakfast breakfast in in bed.bed.They They planned planned to to make make French French toast toast and and chicken chicken porr
47、idge.porridge.They They had had watched watched their their mother mother in in the the kitchen.kitchen.There There was was nothing nothing to to it.it.Jenna Jenna and and Jeff Jeff knew exactly what to do.knew exactly what to do.父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后,没有发火没有发火没有发火没有发火父亲和他们
48、一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐 在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下,早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了他们都非常开心他们都非常开心他们都非常开心他们都非常开心 母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜!双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐Para2:carried the breakfast upstairs woke their mother up.衔接三Module 1 Module 1 读后续写读后续写-增加细节增加细节原文细节原文细节3:3:But B
49、ut Jeffs Jeffs hand hand touched touched the the hot hot burner burner and and he he gave gave a a cry cry of of pain.pain.Jenna Jenna made made him him put put his his hand in cold water.hand in cold water.父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲要发火父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后父亲了解情况后,没有发火没有发火没有发火没有发火父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐父亲和他们一起做
50、早餐父亲和他们一起做早餐 在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下在父亲的助攻下,早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了早餐顺利做好了他们都非常开心他们都非常开心他们都非常开心他们都非常开心 看到早餐看到早餐看到早餐看到早餐,听到祝福听到祝福听到祝福听到祝福,母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜母亲非常惊喜!双胞胎双胞胎双胞胎双胞胎祝母亲节日快乐祝母亲节日快乐祝母亲节日快乐祝母亲节日快乐母亲注意到母亲注意到母亲注意到母亲注意到JeffJeffJeffJeff的小手的小手的小手的小手母亲心疼的同时母亲心疼的同时母亲心疼的同时母亲心疼的同时,亦感动万分亦感动万分亦感动万分亦感动万分收尾点睛收