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1、应用文写作练习之邀请信 讲义假定你是李华，得知外教Mr. Hall寒假不回国，想邀请他到你家过春节。请给他写一 封信，内容包括：1 .时间；2 .一同过节的家人；3 .活动。注意：1 .词数80左右；2 .可以适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。写作指导（一）答题要点提示文体书信体，要求有书信完整的格式。结构 发出邀请一说明事由一说明活动地点和时间一表示期待内容1.时间；2. 一同过节的家人；3.活动。语言这是一封学生写给外籍教师的邀 请信，遣词造句要比较正式，说话要客气有礼貌。（二）写作具体要求1 .内容要点（1）邀请Mr. Hall过春节；（2）时间；（3） 一同过节的家人；（4）活动。2 .应用
2、词汇和语法结构的情况（1）使用与主题相关的词汇；（2）能够使用恰当的语法结构。3 .上下文的连贯性按照内容要点展开写作，使用恰当的连接词或表达法使文章内容连贯。(三)参考范文展示Dear Mr. Hall,Im writing to invite you to come to my home to celebrate the Spring Festival on January 19. Its traditionally a time for family reunion, so my parents and my brother will all be there. Well make du
3、mplings together and have a big dinner. Well also play card games and watch the Spring Festival Gala on TV. You may even get a gift from my parents. If youYe able to come, Ill go and pick you up at your place.Best,Li Hua学生作品点评学生习作1Dear Mr. Hall,Hearing your schedule to stay in China in the coming wi
4、nter vacation, Im writing to extend my sincere invitation to you to spend the Spring Festival with my family.Our family gathering, to be held on the night of February 18th, means cozy reunion for us, including my grandparents, uncles and aunts with their kids. Well have a big feast together, chattin
5、g casually. As for activities, setting off fireworks and going to the temple fair never fail to bring laughter. And I suppose the splendid Spring Festival Gala will also be your cup of tea.Never deprive yourself of such simple pleasures! Looking forward to your early reply.Yours genuinely,Li Hua点评1这
6、篇习作结构完整、表达连贯。邀请信的各个部分之间围绕邀请老师来家里过春节这 一话题形成了一个语义网络，与当时的情景语境融为一体，完全达到了预期的交际目的， 体现了信件的完整性原则(Completeness)。正文引入自然，用现在分词结构“Hearing your schedule to stay in China in the coming winter vacation”作为开头，自然引出信件的目的和 写信人的意图:“Im writing to extend my sincere invitation to you to spend the Spring Festival with my fa
7、mily.”合理采用连接词和语义连贯手段，“As for activities”和“And I suppose the splendid Spring Festival Gala will also be your cup of tea”实现了前后句子的 衔接，从而保证了上下文的连贯与流畅，体现了书信写作的连贯性原则(Coherence)。止匕外，该信件内容要点简洁而清楚。作者紧紧抓住题目所列出的要点“时间，家人和春 节活动”，进行次要点的合理拓展。如家人including my grandparents, uncles and aunts with their kids”；活动包括“big
8、feast, fireworks, the temple fair, the Spring Festival Gala55 等，详略得当，层次分明。作者使用非谓语动词短语达到表达简练的目的，Ourfamily gathering, to be held on the night of February 18th, means cozy reunion for us 句 中用动词不定式短语“to be held on the night of February 18th”做定语修饰“Our伯mily gathering,句意表达完整清晰，简明扼要，达到了书信写作所要求的简洁(Concisenes
9、s) 和清楚(Clarity)的原则。作者在信中用到形容词“cozy”来形容家庭聚会，用“splendid”来描述春节联欢晚会 “Spring Festival Gala”盛况，用双重否定表示肯定的意义，增强“肯定能带来欢声笑语”的语 气， 如 setting off fireworks and going to the temple fair never fail to bring laughter Never deprive yourself of such simple pleasures”等，更显写信人的一片邀约真情，遵守 了书信写作的礼貌(Courtesy)原则。总之，这篇习作格式正
10、确，覆盖了所有内容要点，结构完整，条理清晰，行文连贯， 语言优美，诚恳礼貌，亲切自然，词汇丰富，作者表现出了很强的语言运用能力，是一篇 不可多得的优秀作品，可以进入得分的第五档。学生习作2Dear Mr. Hall,As the New Years Eve is around the corner, I heartly invite you to celebrate it with my family. According to the Chinese lunar calendar, the festival will be on 8th Feburary. On that very day,
11、 my whole family, including my aunts, uncles, cousins, will come to gather together to enjoy a carefully prepared feast. Additionally, ifs a Chinese tradition to make dumplings on that evening. Those hand-made dumplings carry the sincere wishes for a better new year.I would be more than glad if you
12、could join us. You will definitely have a great time and have a taste of the Chinese culture there.Sincerely,Li Hua黠评2这篇习作较为完整和连贯。邀请信的各个部分之间围绕邀请老师来家里过春节这一话 题形成了一个语义网络，与当时的情景语境融为一体，达到了预期的交际目的。正文引入 自然，作者用句子“As the New Years Eve is around the corner”作为开头，自然引出信件 的目的和写信人的意图：“I heartily invite you to cele
13、brate it with my family.”作者在信件的 结尾“I would be more than glad if you could join us”表达希望收信人接受邀请，与信件的开 头形成呼应。为了让行文流畅连贯，作者不但用到了衔接性词语According to the Chinese lunar calendarinAdditionally,还用到了表示指称的指示词 that： u0n that very day, my whole family, including my aunts, uncles, cousins, will come to gather togeth
14、er to enjoy a carefully prepared feast.这句中的that用来回指前文的具体日期，实现了前后句 子照应，从而保证了上下文的连贯与流畅(Coherence)。这篇习作遵循行文简洁(Conciseness)和清楚(Clarity)的原则，开门见山说明自己 写信的意图：“I heartily invite you to celebrate it with my family.”之后，写信人紧紧围绕邀 请信的主要内容，比如春节的时间(on 8th February), 一起过节的家人(my whole family, including my aunts, uncl
15、es, cousins),活动(enjoy a carefully prepared feast, make dumplings)等来展开，简明扼要，信中没有出现无关的内容和信息，让收信人对邀请信的 意图和活动的内容一目了然，从而能欣然接受对方的邀请。写信人在语言上尽量做到礼貌真诚，在邀请信的结尾处用到了虚拟语气，使句子更加 婉转，以示写信人的礼貌(Courtesy) , ul would be more than glad if you could join us., 最后一句用到副词“definitely”来表示如果受邀请的老师来家里过春节一定不会失望，言辞恳 切，真挚的情感溢于言表。遗憾
16、的是信件中出现了部分单词拼写和表达错误：heartly”应为“heartily”； Teburary 应为“February；月日的表达法“on 8th Feburary不太妥当，最好是“the festival w川be on February 8th” 或者“the festival will be on the 8th of Februaryo 根据综合分析，这篇习作 可以进入得分的第四档。学生习作3Dear Mr. Hall,Exhilarated by the news that you wont go back to your country this winter vacatio
17、n, Im writing this letter which conveys my deepest wish for you to spare some time at my home to celebrate the spring festival.Firstly, Id like to inform you its dated in the middle of January. Additionally, my parents as well as my grandparents will be at home. Moreover, we have scheduled several a
18、ctivities including dancing to the music.I cant wait to get your reply.Yours,Li Hua点评3这篇习作信件格式结构完整，有称呼和正文，有结尾和签名。作者也能在选词造句上 考虑到礼貌(Courtesy)而真诚地邀请外教到自己家过春节，如Id like to informcant wait to get your reply等等。覆盖了试题所要求的主要内容要点：时间、家人、活动。但是 作为应用文文体的书信，作者未能做到简洁(Conciseness),比如第一段就是一个句子， 其中包含一个过去分词短语“Exhilarate
19、d by、一个同位语从句“the news that you wont go back to your country this winter vacation”和一个定语从句“which conveys my deepest wish ”显得冗长而拖沓。可以简化成“Exhilarated to hear that you wont go back to your country this winter vacation, Im writing to invite you to celebrate the spring festival at my home.作者未能清楚地交代至ij底安排了哪
20、些活动，we have scheduled several activities including dancing to the music此处的活动介绍应该更具体一些，况且随音乐跳舞也不 是中国人过春节常举行的活动，能成功邀请外教参加的活动应是能体现民族特色的活动。 行文有些刻意追求上下文衔接，过多而又不恰当地使用衔接词，如“Firstly, Additionally, Moreover,由于前后逻辑并非是并列关系，此处弄巧成拙，文内连贯(Coherence)未能 实现。此处建议修改为：“Its dated on January 5th. On that very day my paren
21、ts as well as my grandparents will be at home. To celebrate the family reunion, we have scheduled several activities总之，这篇习作整体而言，基本达到了预期的写作目的，虽漏掉了一些内容，但覆盖 了所有主要内容。所使用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的要求，虽有些错误，但不影响理 解。这篇习作可以进入得分的第三档。学生习作4Dear Mr. Hall,I am writing to invite you to celebrate Spring Festival with my family
22、 on account of you will stay during this winter vacation.Its widely acknowledged that Spring Festival is the most essential part in Chinese daily lives. No matter how busy the business is, we are supposed to crack this hard nut to visit our relatives. With the purpose of enjoying Chinese cultural be
23、tter, you can celebrate Spring Festival together.Never hesitate to turn to us, we will pleased for your arrival.Yours,Li Hua点评4这篇习作结构是完整的，有称呼和正文，有结尾和签名。开门见山，“I am writing to invite you to celebrate Spring Festival with my family .,J 表明 了写信的目的和意图。但写信人想 要表达的内容却没能充分地赋予文本，正文也就是邀请信的最重要部分未能传达清楚，第 句话“Its w
24、idely acknowledged that Spring Festival is the most essential part in Chinese daily lives”是论文文体的语言。信中接下来阐述我们应该去看望亲戚：No matter how busy the business is, we are supposed to crack this hard nut to visit our relatives.”再写起过春季的重要性是为了更好地欣赏中国的文化，只字未提邀请外教来过春节的具体安 排：时间、过节的家人、有哪些活动。所以文章信息未能清楚地传达给收信人，更谈不上 有礼貌地
25、邀请对方了。行文缺乏一定的连贯性(Coherence),第二段中的代词指代不一 致，前一句的主语是“we”，后一句的主语却是“you”，其中未见任何过渡和衔接。还有些 语法错误：比如把介词短语on account作为连词引导从句you will stay during this winter vacation； 信中的最后两句Never hesitate to turn to us, we w川 pleased for your arrival”缺乏连接词，且被动语态的使用有误。总之，这篇习作未描述清楚一些主要内容(缺少Claiity),写了一些无关内容，有些 语法结构的错误，内容也缺乏连贯性，未能很好地完成邀请外教来自己家过春节这一试题 规定的任务。综合来看，只能进入得分的第二档。