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1、INFLUENCING Po cketbook A pocketful of tips, tools and techniques on how to establish rapport, deal with different personalities, handle resistance and, crucially, get a decision Richard Storey Copyright Notice - Please Read The contents of this electronic book (text and graphics) are protected by i
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5、CH, Email: salespocketbook.co.uk ALRESFORD, HAMPSHIRE SO24 9JH UK Web: www.pocketbook.co.uk Enjoy the read! To help you move around this e-Pocketbook we have included a full Table of Contents, with links that take you instantly to the chapter or page of your choice. Be sure to reveal the Table of Co
6、ntents within the navigation pane (sidebar) of your file viewer. In addition, we have embedded links within the book itself, denoted by coloured arrows and text that is underlined. These embedded links will get you swiftly from the Contents page to a specific chapter and from cross-references to oth
7、er parts of the book. A link at the foot of the page will get you back to where you started. Other features that will help improve your reading experience include word search, zoom, page view options and printing (see Copyright Notice on the previous page). It is well worth spending some time famili
8、arising yourself with your document viewer in order to get the best from this e-Pocketbook. Enjoy your reading! THE INFLUENCING POCKETBOOK By Richard Storey Drawings by Phil Hailstone Influence is the unseen lubricant in the engine of business; a management skill more vital than understanding financ
9、e and equally important for a businesss balance sheet. Richard Storey is an expert in this field. His comprehensive coverage provides managers with the most complete quick reference guide available today. Ed Lee, Training and Development Manager, BT Consulting & Systems Integration Provides extremel
10、y comprehensive guidance on a subject which many managers have difficulty with. It is well laid out so that it can be used as an introduction to influencing and for quick reference purposes prior to that difficult meeting. Steve Ravenhill, Director of Human Resources, SunGard Availability Services (
11、UK) Ltd CONTENTS PLANNING TO INFLUENCE 1INFLUENCING THROUGH RAPPORT 57 Mastering the art, areas of hidden Ten good reasons to build rapport, and open influence, characteristics of an biographic matching and pacing, uses of effective influencer, outcomes, objectives, mismatching, the role of networki
12、ng 5 easy steps to influence, how to behave, importance of rehearsal INFLUENCING DIFFERENT 69 PERSONALITIES INFLUENCING STYLES 15 Four personality types - how to Eight influencing styles, the power identify them through both positive and of positive behaviour and how to negative behaviour patterns,
13、and how to replicate it influence them WHATS IN IT FOR ME? 29 HANDLING RESISTANCE 85 What makes people say yes, taking Why people resist, types of resistance, into account principles & values, beliefs strategies & tactics, techniques for dealing & opinions, needs & necessities and wants & with the d
14、ifferent categories of people you wishes, differentiating between features, may want to influence benefits and advantages of a proposal GETTING A DECISION 99 COMMUNICATING YOUR MESSAGE 39 Know when to ask for a decision, dealing A model to open discussion and build need, opening gambit, winning word
15、s, SuperQuestions to deal with lazy and limiting language, listening techniques with ditherers, tactics to secure a decision MORE SOURCES & RESOURCES 108 Films, books and other useful aids Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd P LANNING TO INFLUENCE 1Copyright protected - Management Pocke
16、tbooks Ltd Contents Page PLANNING TO INFLUENCE WHAT IS INFLUENCING? Influencing is: Getting your own way, especially unobtrusively. Most managers do it, most of the time. You can influence others simply by being you (notice how easily children are influenced by the behaviour of those around them) Yo
17、u can influence covertly, behind the scenes You can use more open strategies and tactics Great influencers manage to get other people to go along with their ideas while maintaining the relationship. If people feel manipulated, relationships will be damaged. It is important to understand the differen
18、t strategies available to you and to plan your approach. 2Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE MASTERING THE ART Increasingly, todays managers are measured by their ability to influence others at work. Being able to get people to do what you want has a direct effect
19、 on: The well-being of your staff The prosperity of your company And, ultimately, your own destiny You are probably already successful at influencing others - some of the time. How can you become consistently successful? If you can identify your strengths and weaknesses and make a few changes, nothi
20、ng can hold you back. What is the number one ne ed for success in business today? value and the value of my ideas. To persuade others of my American Management Association (from a survey of 2800 executives) 3Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE TYPICAL AREAS OF OPEN
21、 INFLUENCE A lot of the time, especially in business, influencing is necessary and we accept it as part of human communication. It operates openly and usually follows a recognised process. Open influence can be seen in: Meetings Presentations Sales conversations Debates and discussions Change manage
22、ment Reports Proposals Negotiations Performance management Process management 4Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE TYPICAL AREAS OF HIDDEN INFLUENCE Influence can also operate in a less open and direct manner. Your behaviour will be noticed by others, even though y
23、ou are not necessarily trying to influence them. Your words will always be interpreted, however subtle or oblique. In short - whether we mean to influence or not - we are constantly beaming out influential messages to the world. Hidden influence, which is often delicate, slow and on-going, works wel
24、l in the following areas: Changing an image or behaviour Nurturing relationships Altering attitude Counselling others Networking Acting as a mentor Communicating non-verbally Maintaining customer relations Developing and maintaining rapport Using metaphor and analogy 5Copyright protected - Managemen
25、t Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE WHAT MAKES AN EFFECTIVE INFLUENCER? Winning influencers share attitudes and behaviours that ensure consistent success. Studies have shown that they: I ndicate the benefits of their ideas N eutralise resistance, preferably in advance F ind alternative ways to i
26、nfluence others L isten attentively to what others say U ncover needs and wants E mpathise continuously N otice how others respond C reate and maintain rapport throughout E liminate weak statements from their language R ehearse, rehearse, rehearse 6Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PL
27、ANNING TO INFLUENCE LIKELY OUTCOMES OF YOUR INFLUENCE Most of the time, you will be seeking these outcomes: To maintain an existing positive relationship To gain commitment to your ideas To ensure your message is passed on to others All influence gains some sort of reaction. On a scale of 1 to 5, th
28、ese are the most likely responses you will receive. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Total commitment General agreement Compliance Open disagreement Hidden sabotage Terrific idea, wish Id thought of it. When do we start? Not a bad idea. Ive got one or two doubts. OK - youre the boss. I suppose wed better start. This
29、just wont work and heres why. (Thinks) You reckon itll work; Ill prove you wrong. 7Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE KNOWING WHAT YOU WANT Influencing is all about getting others to see things your way. Changing disagreement to agreement. But how do they see thin
30、gs? How far apart are your conflicting viewpoints - or is there some overlap? Seeking areas of mutual agreement and amplifying DIS AGREE MENT these will automatically help you to minimise points of disagreement. By dovetailing your outcomes and recognising the needs of others, you immediately establ
31、ish rapport. Rapport is the foundation of effective, long-lasting influence. 8Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE YOUR INFLUENCING OBJECTIVES Write down clearly and positively what you really want to achieve. Imagine what it will be like to achieve your outcome. Wh
32、at will it: - Look like? - Sound like? - Feel like? What is the context? Where, when, with whom? Is the outcome in your hands, or will you have to rely on others to make it happen? How might others be affected by your achievement? Are you happy with that? 9Copyright protected - Management Pocketbook
33、s Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE 5 EASY STEPS TO INFLUENCE Here are the five main steps to effective influential communication. Make this pattern second nature, leaving you to concentrate on the detail. 1. Gain rapport Be on their level; recognise their beliefs and values; match their behaviour patterns
34、and blend your personality characteristics with theirs. 2. Ask questions Elicit needs and different responses; probe to identify their motives, attitudes and feelings. 3. Listen actively Demonstrate that you are listening; listen with all your senses; suspend judgement. 4. Stress pertinent benefits
35、Summarise how specific benefits of your proposal accurately reflect their needs. 5. Work towards a decision Ask questions which will force a decision (or rejection); test interest through hypothetical questions; make positive statements which assume their acceptance. 5. Decision 4. Benefits 3. Liste
36、n 2. Questions 1. Rapport 10 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE BEHAVING AS IF YOU WILL SUCCEED We are all influenced in some way by other peoples behaviour. If they look and sound convincing, we are more likely to be influenced by them. Look the part; use positiv
37、e body language to reinforce your messages Sound the part; underline your messages with the appropriate tone Avoid words that weaken the power of your messages Avoid unnecessary hesitation Words that unintentionally weaken your message: Could Sorry Not usually Maybe I dont suppose. May Might Try Pos
38、sible 11 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE BELIEVE IN YOURSELF Many people give up far too early. What if the great explorers, inventors, artists and politicians had thrown in the towel and gone home early? People who persevere recognise that early failure can pr
39、ovide helpful feedback. Experience + acceptance of failure = defeat and resignation Experience + review of feedback = learning, choice and growth However, focusing too much effort on issues over which you have no influence or control can result in feelings of helplessness and powerlessness. The tric
40、k is to recognise that this is the case and back out gracefully. 12 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE LUCK - OR GOOD PLANNING? The golfer, Arnold Palmer, was once told that he was really lucky. Yes, he replied, and the more I practise, the luckier I get. 13 Copyr
41、ight protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd PLANNING TO INFLUENCE REHEARSE, REHEARSE, REHEARSE The value of rehearsing complex influencing situations cannot be over emphasised. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. Note your objectives Find a suitable partner to role play with Choose the actual location where
42、you will be doing it for real Brief your partner thoroughly Practise one run through Discuss the outcome and agree changes Do a second run through Discuss the outcome Repeat as often as needed 10. Go in to the actual scenario with great confidence! 14 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd
43、 I NFLUENCING STYLES 15 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd Contents Page INFLUENCING STYLES THE FLEXIBLE MANAGER The way in which you behave as a manager and the approach you take will have a marked effect on your ultimate success or failure. Having a range of approaches and styles of
44、behaviour gives you more flexibility. It increases your options - and your chance of success. Keep on doing what you always do and youll always get what you always got. 16 Copyright protected - Management Pocketbooks Ltd INFLUENCING STYLES NATURAL STYLES Most managers have a natural style of influen
45、ce which they prefer to use whenever possible. More flexible managers also keep in reserve a fall back style, used when the preferred style doesnt achieve the desired results. However, there are at least eight identifiable styles of influence - not including aggression, manipulation or force! Becaus
46、e you are influencing a wide range of people, proficiency in a wider range of styles will ensure more success. Step outside the comfort zone of your natural style and enjoy greater success by practising new ways of influencing. Beware: think carefully which influencing style has the greatest chance of succ