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1、1 Unit 13 Friendship Preview Friendship is a unique relationship. In contrast to most other relationships, friendship is voluntary. There are legal and religious ceremonies for marriage, and social and legal rules for governing marital relationships. We have no parallel ceremonies to recognize frien
2、dships and no formal standards to guide interaction among friends. The lack of social standards and recognition makes friendship a particularly challenging and exciting relationship. Text Reading Warm-up Knowing friendship. Friendship is universal; a close friend is a close friend anywhere. There ar
3、e qualities we all admire in friends, and things all of us would do for friends. Now share your views on friendship with your friends. 1. In your country, where, when, or how did you first meet your friends? Circle as many as possible. a. childhood f. jobs b. within the family g. neighbors c. sports
4、 h. college or university d. organizations i. party e. schools j. classroom 2. How many years have you known your closest friends? a. less than one year b. one to five years c. five to twelve years d. twelve to twenty years e. more than twenty years 3. Circle five qualities that you think are the mo
5、st important in a friend. a. sense of humor b. intelligence c. warmth d. physical beauty e. loyalty f. independence (i.e., not being too dependent on you) g. complete honesty h. similar religious beliefs i. similar political beliefs 名师资料总结 - - -精品资料欢迎下载 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 名师精心整理 - -
6、 - - - - - 第 1 页，共 12 页 - - - - - - - - - 2 j. similar educational background 4. Which of the following actions would probably end a friendship of yours? a. your lending money to a friend and not getting it back b. a friend becoming involved with someone you dont like c. your moving to a new place d
7、. your friend gossiping behind you II. Do you prefer going out with a group of friends or with one or two friends? Explain your preferences. Text Relationships: Friends and Acquaintance sDeena R. Levine and Mara B. Adelman 1 What do Americans mean when they use the word friend? The dictionary define
8、s it as: one attached to another by affection (love) or esteem (great respect and admiration; a good opinion of sb), Americans, however, use the word more freely than the dictionary definition. A friend might be an acquaintance or an intimate (close) companion (a person who has similar tastes, inter
9、ests, etc. to your own and whose company you enjoy) that one has known since childhood. It is difficult to define this word precisely (accurately) as it is used in American English, because it covers many different relationships. My friend and I took our kids to the park yesterday. My friend told me
10、 about a wonderful restaurant. My friend listened to my problems for two hours yesterday. We hear such daily uses of the word friend without knowing the quality (the standard of sth when it is compared to other things like it) of the friendship mentioned. 2 In general, Americans have casual (without
11、 deep affection) friendly relationships with many people, but deeper, closer friendships with only a few. True friendships require time and commitment (a promise to do sth or to behave in a particular way), which many Americans lack. Therefore, they often find it convenient to have friendly but less
12、 committed relationships, rather than many deep, close friendships. Unlike the stereotype (a fixed idea or image that many people have of a particular type of person or thing, but which is often not true in reality), Americans do indeed have close friends, but in addition they have friendships that
13、can be characterized as superficial (not concerned with anything serious or important and lacking any depth of understanding or feeling). Their shortage of time and their numerous (many) commitments to family, work, and even volunteer projects mean Americans have less time to pursue (seek) many clos
14、e friends. Friendliness Versus (v.s./ vs=against) Friendship 3 Many people around the world characterize (consider/ regard) Americans as friendly. Americans, especially in comparison to certain other cultural groups, tend to smile and talk easily with others even if they are strangers (in big cities
15、, this is less common). For example, people waiting in lines (i.e., in the post office or in the grocery store) often strike up conversations with each other. They may even disclose (to give sb information about sth, especially sth that was 名师资料总结 - - -精品资料欢迎下载 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 名师
16、精心整理 - - - - - - - 第 2 页，共 12 页 - - - - - - - - - 3 previously secret) personal information in encounters with strangers whom they will never see again. This seems unusual (uncommon) to many foreigners in the United States. From their point of view, how can a person trust a stranger enough to chat f
17、reely and reveal personal information? After all, in most of the world, strangers are not to be trusted. 4 The following is an account (description) of what an American woman learned about the American man she was standing behind in a line in a post office. In about eight minutes, he revealed that:
18、(1) he was married and his wife was about to have a baby; (2) he was unhappy with his job as a salesman and was considering a mid-life career change (not uncommon in the United States); (3) he and his wife were trying to figure out (work out) if it would be better to work harder or to take more time
19、 off (take holidays, ask for leave) from work so that they could relax more. 5 This is perhaps an extreme example (even for many Americans) of how strangers reveal aspects (particular parts or feature of a situation, an idea, a problem, etc) of their lives to each other. To many people around the wo
20、rld, this openness (frankness, the quality of not being confined or covered) would be considered abnormal (not normal, unusual) and even (suspect-) suspicious. Some would stereotype (vt. to form a fixed idea about a person or thing which may not really be true) this man and might say, Well, hes a sa
21、lesman. What do you expect? While many Americans would find his openness excessive, this type of person is not a rarity. Diversity in Personal Relationships 6 In the United States, men and women socialize (to meet and spend time with people in a friendly way, in order to enjoy yourself) relatively f
22、reely and develop a variety of relationships. To people from cultures where contact between the sexes is limited (or even forbidden), this variety can be confusing. Single and married people of the opposite sex may be close friends and share personal problems without being romantically involved. Col
23、lege students and others may even live with someone of the opposite sex for practical reasons only. That is, they may be friends (without any romantic connection) who feel that they are compatible (they can have a good relationship because they have similar ideas, interests, etc.) as roommates or ho
24、usemates. In contrast, many men and women decide to live together before they are married to see how compatible they are. Some of these relationships end up in (result in) successful marriages; others break up (end, dismiss) before (and some after) marriage. In many parts of the United States (altho
25、ugh not all), there are few restrictions (limits) on the types of relationships people can have. This does not mean that you will see nontraditional relationships everywhere you go to the United States. However, in some of the big cities and in areas not characterized as conservative (opposed to gre
26、at or sudden social change; showing that you prefer traditional styles and values), you will see a great deal of variety of types of personal relationships. 7 In the United States, marriage relationships, of course, different from couple to couple, but there are some generalities (major characterist
27、ics) that can be made. Some married men and women consider themselves to be best friends as well as spouses. This concept is unusual in some cultures particularly where the marriage is arranged or is a marriage of convenience ( 基于利害关系的婚姻 ). Some foreigners in the United States have mentioned that is
28、 impossible for a spouse to be a best friend. On the other hand, some Americans hold the same belief, but probably not for cultural reasons. 8 Many people remarry if they have been divorced or widowed (if sb is widowed , their husband or wife has died). Remarriage has no stigma (feelings of disappro
29、val that people have 名师资料总结 - - -精品资料欢迎下载 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 名师精心整理 - - - - - - - 第 3 页，共 12 页 - - - - - - - - - 4 about particular illnesses or ways of behaving) in the United States. In fact, some widowed or divorced people are encouraged by their grown children to continue to soc
30、ialize and even remarry. Indeed, many older people feel that they have a right to continued happiness in personal relationships regardless of their age. Therefore, more people have been seeking companionships with new friends in their golden years. Mobility and Friendship 9 Americans are geographica
31、lly mobile (able to move or travel around easily), and many learn to develop friendships easily and quickly. Approximately (About) one out of every American families moves every year. People relocate (to move or to move sb/sth to a new place to work or operate) because they change jobs, attend dista
32、nt colleges, get married, have children, or simply want a change in their lives. Perhaps as a consequence (as a result), people sometimes form and end friendships quickly. Students attend two or three universities during their undergraduate (years) and graduate years may change their circle of frien
33、ds several times. Likewise (=Similarly), people who change their jobs, while keeping one or two friends from the original place of employment, may also change their circle of friends. 10 Relationships based on a common activity may fade (to disappear gradually) or end when the activity ends. Mothers
34、 may meet while dropping their children off at nursery school and remain friends until their kids go to different schools. The same holds (=is) true for neighbors who are closest friends until one moves away. These friendships are not deep but are based upon shared (common) daily experiences. Many A
35、mericans, in general, do have enduring (lasting for a long time) friendships, but at certain points in their lives can be satisfied with transient (continuing for only a short time) relationships. In cultures where people have only lifetime friends (in part because they do not move from city to city
36、), these temporary (lasting or intended to last or be used only for a short time; not permanent) relationships are hard to understand. But many Americans move so often that learning to make friends quickly becomes a necessary (survive-) survival skill. Notes This text is adapted from Beyond Language
37、: Cross-Cultural Communication, which helps students understand and adapt to cultural differences and values when communicating with speakers of American English. to strike up a conversation : to initiate or begin a conversation. midlife career: Midlife is a normal developmental life stage. At this
38、stage, people may consider a career change in the U.S. This type of person is not a rarity : It is common to meet this type of person in the U.S a marriage of convenience: a marriage contracted for reasons other than the reasons of relationship, family, or love. Instead, such a marriage is orchestra
39、ted for personal gain or some other sort of strategic purpose, such as immigration. golden years: the years after middle age. Word Bank account：n. a written or spoken description of an event( 书面或口头 )报告acquaintance: a person that you have met but do not know well 相识，熟人affection : a feeling of liking
40、for a person or place友爱，爱情名师资料总结 - - -精品资料欢迎下载 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 名师精心整理 - - - - - - - 第 4 页，共 12 页 - - - - - - - - - 5 commitment : a promise to do sth. or to behave in a particular way 承诺；责任；compatible : able to exist, live together, or work successfully with sth. or sb. else 能共处的
41、；能共存的；能相容的conservative: tending not to like or trust change, especially sudden change 保守的，守旧的divorce: legal ending of a marriage离婚esteem: respect for or a good opinion of sb. 尊敬，尊重excessive : too much过度的，过多的generality : when what sb. says contains no details, and often very little meaning 普遍性，通性inti
42、mate : having, or being likely to cause, a very close friendship亲密的mobile: able to move freely or be easily moved可移动的，易变的，机动的pursue: to follow sb. or sth., usually to try to catch or kill them 追随；跟随rarity : sth. that is very unusual, or the quality of being very unusual 稀有relocate: to (cause a perso
43、n or company to) move to a new place 换一个地方；重新安置reveal: to make known or show sth. that is surprising or that was previously secret 展现， 显示，揭示，暴露spouse: a persons husband or wife 配偶stigma: a strong feeling in society that a type of behavior is shameful 耻辱；瑕疵superficial : only on the surface of sth. 表面
44、的；肤浅的transient : lasting for only a short time; temporary短暂的widowed: having become a widow or a widower守寡的；成为鳏夫的Phrases and Expressions attach to: to connect one thing with another系，连接break up : to stop a relationship( 突然)结束encounter with : to meet sb., especially when you do not expect it 偶遇end up:
45、 to finally be in a particular place, state, or situation, especially without having planned it 以.结束，结果为 . strike up : to start a conversation or relationship with sb. 交谈起来，结交起来Reading Comprehension Choose the best for each of the following . 1. The authors say that Americans use the word friend dif
46、ferently than the way the dictionary defines the word. What do the authors mean by saying so? A. Americans use the word friend in a narrower sense than it is defined in the dictionary. B. Americans use the word friend to refer to close friends. C. Americans use the word friend in a larger sense than
47、 it is defined in the dictionary. D. The dictionary defines the word friend in a wrong way. 2. Americans have a few close friends because _. A. they are lazy B. they do not have time C. they have many commitments to friendship D. both B and C 名师资料总结 - - -精品资料欢迎下载 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
48、名师精心整理 - - - - - - - 第 5 页，共 12 页 - - - - - - - - - 6 3. According to the authors, how do many Americans behave with others even if they are strangers? A. They tend to be shy. B. They tend to smile. C. They tend to talk easily. D. Both B and C. 4. In the United States, marriage relationships are _.
49、A. all the same B. different from couple to couple C. arranged D. mature 5. The authors say that in the United States remarriage is considered normal, and they point out that grown sons and daughters often encourage their widowed or divorced parents to _. A. stay home alone B. buy gold C. continue t
50、o socialize D. travel II. Complete the following summary of the text by filling in the blanks with words. The initial letter of each word has been given to you . Americans use the word friend more extensively than what a dictionary defines. A friend might be an (1) acquaintance or an intimate compan